ParksandRecreation《公园与游憩（2009）》第二季第二十集完整中英文对照剧本.docx

早上好Goodmorning.海角乐园/瑞士家庭鲁宾逊SwissFamilyRobinson1960年电影喔瑞士家庭Ron宾逊那顶帽子太局♥了Whoo!SwissFamilyRon-binson!Thathatisdope.谢TomThanks,Tom.你介意我把这个诱人之物在我穹顶上试一下吗YoumindifIrockthatbadLarryonmydome?戴在我头上试试桃花运Wearitonmyhead?Tryitontheladies?请便吧Bemyguest.嗨我是TOm我头上有只浣熊Hi,mTom.Ihavearaccoononmyhead.打扰一下我这个朋友在你的垃圾里挖宝Excuseme?Myfriendoverherewasdiggingthroughyourtrash我觉得我们有很多共同点我是TomandIthinkwemayhavealotincommon.mTom.有空一起看个电影吗Wouldyouliketoseeamoviesometime?你是只浣熊吗Areyouaraccoon?因为你在我的帼子里跑了一整天Becauseyou'vebeenrunningaroundmyhatallday.脑子里Headallday.姑娘你比珍爱更是真爱Girl,you'remorepreciousthanPrecious.不Uh-uh."漂亮帽子想做♥爱♥吗"那是你跟我说的"Nicehat.Wannabone?"That,syou,talkingtome.不这句如何”是的我是个猎人捕获你的季节到了”No.Howabout,"Yes,Iamahunter,andit'syouseason."喔这也太棒了我得回去了Whoa,that,sgreatIgottagetbackoutthere.你知道他们说的浣熊在头床上野兽Youknowwhattheysay,animalonthehead,manimalinthebed.该死姑娘你的性感秒杀了我的浣熊Damn,girl!Yourhotnesskilledmyraccoon!我有顶浣熊帽子我是个有趣的人Ihavearaccoonhat.maninterestingperson.你好哇Hello!桃花运来了吗Anyluck?没Nope.没有我想象中那么有效Didn'tworkoutaswellasIthoughtitwould.好吧下次好运Well,betterlucknexttime.我试过了看起来就不.Itried.Itjustdidn'tseemlike.哇我喜欢那顶帽子Wow.Ilovethathat.谢谢你女士Thankyou,ma'am.公园与游憩公园与游憩公园与游憩第2季第20集第2季第20集嘿ROn我有个惊喜要给你Hey,Ron.Ihaveasurpriseforyou.11:30HarveyJames公园见MeetmeatHarveyJamesParkat11:30.为什么-是个惊喜Why?-It'sasurprise!惊喜是什么What,sthesurprise?如果我告诉你就毁了这个惊喜IfItoldyou,itwouldruinthesurprise.会毁门十么惊喜What'sthesurpriseitwouldruin?我不能告诉你Icannottellyouthat.1.eslie我第一任妻子Tammy尝试给我办一场惊喜生日派对1.eslie,myfirstwife,Tammy,triedthrowingmeasurprisebirthdayparty.当我看到躲在衡户后的朋友们WhenIsawmyfriendshidingthroughthewindow,我开车去加油站报r警Idrovetoagasstation,calledthecops告诉他们有人闯入我的家andtoldthempeoplehadbrokenintomyhome.我真不喜欢惊喜mnotbigonsurprises.好的但你会喜欢这个的Okay,butyou'regonnalikethisone.是什么-我不告诉你Whatisit?-mnottellingyou.我也不会告诉任何人Andmnotgonnatellanybody!好吧我告诉你Okay.lltellyou.我们要编写公园部夏日特辑We'reputtingtogethertheParksDepartmentSummerCatalog.大惊喜是我准备重乘AndthebigsurpriseisIamgoingtoreunite所有在世公园部前任主任共进野餐allthelivingformerParksDirectorsatapicnic,录下整个过程recordthewholething,然后写进“欢迎辞”andthenwriteaboutitinthe"WelcomeLetter."这是一年里最大的特辑It'sthebiggestcatalogoftheyear.想想9月号♥的VogueThinkoftheSeptemberissueofVogue.但对Pawnee更重要Butit,smoreimportanttoPawnee.主要因为我们这也没有VogUeMainlybecausewedon'tgetVoguehere.我要吧这个"渴望"广&hearts浩♥放在中间插页mgonnamovethis"Yearning"adtothecenterfold.中间插页总是最棒的部分我说的对吧JustinCenterfold,alwaysthebestpart.AmIright,Justin?该死他们六周前就分手了是啊Damn,theybrokeupsixweeksago.-Yeah.Jerry我要看看你拍的垒球照片Jerry,Ineedtoseeyoursoftballpictures.来了主编Hereyougo,Chief.哇干得漂亮很好啊-喔Wow,goodjob.Nicework.-Whoa!等等那不是那个古怪男吗Waitaminute.Isn'tthatthatcreepyguy?Morgan那个恋童癖Morgan?Thepedophile?是就是哦我的天Yeah,itis.-Oh,myGod.哦JerryOh,Jerry!不会吧我也不知道啊Comeon!Ididn'tknowthat!他看起来还好啊Heseemedokay.我们还一起吃饭了Wehaddinnertogether.伙计们我不知道我是否明确Guys,Idon'tknowifImadeitclear,我不想让我们的公园特辑有任何性侵者butIdon,twantanysexoffendersinourParkscatalog.好吧我把他的脸PS掉Okay,IwillPhotoshophisface.你能把你的生活PS出点好决定吗JeITyCanyouPhotoshopyourlifewithbetterdecisions,Jerry?好了APriI够TOkay,April.Enough.封面照Tom你上Coverphoto.Tom,you'reup.这本特辑基本上就是公园部的广♥告♥Thiscatalogisbasically,like,anadfortheParksDepartment,而我喜欢广♥告♥andIloveads.我喜欢杂♥志♥上风味伏特加的广&hearts浩♥1lovemagazineadsforflavoredvodkas,设计师牛仔裤的广&hearts浩♥展板billboardsfordesignerjeans.我录电视节目只为看到广♥告♥ITiVothroughshowstogettotheads.我爱广告Iloveads.我们准备对这个特辑干什么Whatarewetryingtodowiththiscatalog?我们准备向Pawnee推销我们的夏口课程We'retryingtosellPawneeonoursummerclasses.如何做到用一张完美的迷人的图片Howdowedothat?Withoneperfect,captivatingimage.AprilApril?现代生活我们要跑向哪里Modernlife.Wherearewerunning?又是我们想要的不是我们现有的Sometimes,whatwewantisnotalwayswhereweare.下一张Nextslide.我们是否孤独Arewealone?真正的冬天是在我们心里吗Istherealwinterinsideourhearts?我们都在一个拒绝询问的世界里挣扎着一些意义Weareallstrugglingfordefinitioninaworldthatresistsourinquiries.好的这从几个原因上都说不通Okay,thisisn'tgonnaworkforanumberofreasons.一这是个夏日特辑One,thisisasummercatalog.二刚刚那些完全是胡言乱语Two,thatwascompletegibberish.三那个小孩看起来像被遗弃了Andthree,thatchildlookslikeit'sabandoned.所以基本上呸So,basically,boo.下一张Nextslide.哦天奇怪这怎么Oh,God.Weird.Howdidthat.那是张个人图片那.不应该.肯定是That'sapersonalphoto.That's.Shouldn'tbe.thismust've.我得说我觉得这真可以用作我们的封面照Youknow,Igottasay,Ithinkthatcouldactuallyworkasourcoverphoto.你们没问题的话我也没问题这是张高清图片mcoolwithit,ifyouguysare.It'sahigh-resphoto.我不知道我有没有时间了伙计们1don'tknowifIhavetimeforthis,guys,所以我们就挑张好图好吗so,let'sjustpickagoodphoto,okay?你想要啥Leslie一张家长推孩子荡秋千的照片吗Whatdoyouwant,Leslie?Apictureofparentspushingakidonaswing?是的就是这给我来-张Yeah.Exactly.Getmethat.好我该走了Okay.Igottago.他在想什么呢Whatishethinking?"我的杯子咋这么小""Whyismycupsotiny?"嘿你来这干啥Hey.Whatareyoudoinghere?六个月纪念口快乐我给你准备了礼物Happysix-monthanniversary.Igotyouagift是个鸡肉沙拉三明治It,sachickensaladsandwich.我不想让你因为AndIdon'twantyoutofeelbad没给我准备礼物觉得不好因为我永远不会指望aboutnotgettingmeanything,becauseIwouldneverexpect.瑞士陆军手表你个混♥蛋♥SwissArmyWatch,mofo.干得漂亮啊Perkins哇Welldone.Perkins.Wow!你喜欢吗Youlikeit?太感谢r这也太好了Thankyousomuch.Thafssonice.你能在病房♥里亲我吗Areyouallowedtokissmeinahospitalroom?哦不用担心他已经死了Oh,don'tworryaboutit.He'sdead.我的天哪Oh,myGod.哦不我开玩笑的他睡着了Oh,no,mjustkidding,he,ssleeping.哦好吧Oh,okay.是的我们的关系发展不错非常不错Yeah,ourrelationshipisgoingwell.Reallywell.那个人看起来真的死了Thatguyreallyseemeddead.棒Nice!来接住这个Here,catchthis.你打中我脸了哦Yougotmeintheface!Oh!这个好疼你胳膊挺有劲的Thatonehurt.You'veagoodarm.我知道我在高中打过垒球Iknow.Iusedtoplaysoftballinhighschool.开玩笑吧我在高中打过棒球Shutup!Iplayedbaseballinhighschool.开玩笑吧-是那就像是男孩版本的垒球Shutup!-Yeah,that'slike,theboyversionofsoftball.伙计们别拿食物当玩具好吧我们野餐要用Guys,don'tplaywiththefood,okay?Weneedthisforthepicnic.所有东西带齐了吧-是的长官DoWehaveeverything?-Yes,ma'am.三个野餐篮各种奶酪葡萄酒Threepicnicbaskets,assortedcheeses,grapes,wine.照三文鱼呢Smokedsalmon?April把熏三文鱼扔屋顶上去了Aprilthrewthesmokedsalmonontheroof.对不起哦msorry.1.eslie在哪她刚刚用你的手♥机♥给我发短♥信♥Where'sLeslie?Shejusttextedmefromyourphone说她自己手♥机♥掉家里了andsaidsheleftherphoneathome而我需要立即过来andthatIshouldcomehereimmediately.我为啥要相信这个啊AndwhydidIbelievethat?或许在你心里你知道是我发的但你还是来了Maybeinyourheartyouknewitwasfromme,butyoucameanyway.不是Nope.Tom拜托别再给我发Tom,wouldyoupleasestoptextingme你又城市规划紧急事务的短♥信♥了好嘛thatyou,rehavingacityplanningemergency?城市规划就没有紧急事务这一说There'snosuchthingasacityplanningemergency.你好啊-你好Hi,there.-Hi.看看你们俩1.ookatyoutwo.AnnPerkinsMarkBrendanawicz加起来就是"Anndanawicz"AnnPerkins,MarkBrendanawicz."Anndanawicz."或者"Merkins"不还是"Anndanawicz"Or"Merkins."No,"Anndanawicz."你俩应该当模特Youtwoshouldbemodels.或者出现在公园部夏日特辑的封面上呢MaybeonthecoveroftheParksDepartmentSummerCatalog?这不是你找我来的原因对吧That'snotthereasonyoucalledmeinhere,right?因为我刚刚结束一个12小时的轮班如果这是.'CauseIjustfinisheda12-hourshift.Ifthat'sthereason.来嘛Ann这能给Leslie帮个大忙Comeon,Ann.It'dbeahugefavorforLeslie.你知道这对她有多重要Youknowhowimportantthisistoher.算我一个大哥Well,Iamin.-Dude!我加入啊Iam.我们俩都没有单独的合照Wedon'thaveanypicturesofjustthetwoofus.而且我也一直在说我们应该多和Tom约会Plus,vealwayssaidweshouldgoonmoredateswithTom.是你是说过,Yeah,youhave.感谢上帝这个机会自己来了AndthankGodanopportunitypresenteditself.看到了吗双赢See?Win-win.Ann你要换衣服对吧Now,Ann,you,regonnachange,right?我猜是的Iguess.你抹点唇膏会要了命吗Woulditkillyoutomaybeputonsomelipstick?你有唇膏吗Doyouevenownlipstick?这可能是这四个伟人Thisisprobablythefirsttimeinhistorythesefourgreatmen历史性的第一次同时同地出现havebeeninthesameplaceatthesametime.这让你Itkindofmakesyou.这是啥Whatisthis?毛衣交换大战她发现了Sweaterswap!Shenoticed!你没猜错-哦天哪有人来了Youwereright.-Oh,myGod.Somebody1Shere.好的伙计们表现正常Okay.Guys,justactnormal.拜托了就像正常人一样Please?Justbelikenormalpeople.你好嗨DavidMoser我是LeslieKnopeHello!Hi!DavidMoser!mLeslieKnope.见到你是我的荣幸Itissuchanhonortomeetyou.是Right.这事要多久Howlongisthisgonnatake?哦不会太久我意识到当然您是非常忙的人Oh,notverylong.Irealize,ofcourse,you'reaverybusyman.我爱公园Iloveparks.我不知道这是不是之前讲过的事情Idon'tknowifthat'ssomethingvecommunicatedbefore.所以和所有在世前任公园部主任野餐So,havingapicnicwithalltheformerlivingParksDepartmentDirectors.猜猜谁刚刚划掉遗愿清单上的一项了Guesswhojustcheckedsomethingoffherbucketlist?ClarenceCarringtonDavidMoserClarenceCarrington,DavidMoser,MichaelTansleyRonSwansonMichaelTansley,RonSwanson,在这个万里无云的好日子里聚在这个美丽的公园gatheredtogetheronabeautifuldayinthisbeautifulpark.我觉得我们该用一小段时间感激自己如此幸运IthinkWeshouldjusttakeamomentandappreciatehowluckyWeare.我以为你死了QarenCeIthoughtyouweredead,Clarence.不我会活得比你久然后我会上了你老婆No.mgonnaoutliveyou,thenmgonnanailyourwife.操♥你♥妈♥你个老傻瓜Screwyou,youoldcoot.典型的David你比Ron还恶劣ClassicDavid.You'reworsethanRon.闭上你该死的嘴TansleyShutyourdamnmouth,Tansley.好的我们出发吧Okay!Great!Let'sgo!我说”公园“你们说“部门“公园WhenIsay,parks,"yousay"department!"Parks!公园Parks!不能Apartment!哦天花的时间比我想象中更久Oh,boy.ThisistakingalotlongerthanIthoughtitwould.你们能先跑过去把野餐准备好吗Canyouguysrunupaheadandsetupthepicnic?行Sure.啊他们要带着食物去哪儿Ah.Wherearetheygoingwiththefood?我饿死了我只吃了一顿早饭mstarving.Ionlyhadonebreakfast.好的放松Okay,relax.刚刚那是怎么回事为啥要互相抨击1.ook,whatwasgoingonbackthere?Whyallthesniping?不完全确定Notexactlysure.我只认识MichaelTheonlyoneIknowisMichael,我们也不是啥好朋友-嗯andwe,renotexactlybestfriends.-Hmm.我饿了mhungry.好吧嗯别像个孩子Okay,well,don'tbesuchababy.我给你做了点培根当沿路零食Icookedyousomebaconforatrailsnack.我已经吃了-啥Iateitalready.-What?我停车之前就能从你包里闻到了IcouldsmellitinyourpursebeforeIevenparkedmycar.现在已经没了我讨厌这一切Andnowit'sgone.AndIhateeverything.好好好行了Good,good,good.Allright.我觉得我们搞定Leslie想要的那种俗套无聊照片了1thinkwegottheboringclichedshotthatLesliewanted.就这样吗我们拍完了That'sit?We'redone?还差得远呢Notevenclose.现在真正的艺术开始了Nowtherealartbegins.第一步Stepone,用一张优秀符号&heart引性的图片搞定这次拍摄nailthisphotoshootwithanamazing,iconicimage.第二部预订一些室外的活Steptwo,booksomeoutsidegigs.第三步和一个模特做♥爱♥Stepthree,havesexwithamodel.第四步走到相机前成为模特Stepfour,stepinfrontofthecamera,becomeamodel.上是的继续滑动继续滑动Go,yes!Keepslithering!Keepslithering!Ann你脸上能给我点什么吗随便什么Ann,canyougivemesomething,anything,intheface?你想要我做什么啊Whatdoyouwantmetodo?做Mark做的事情啊他就很棒DowhatMark'sdoing.He'sdoinggreat!继续滑动Keepslithering!我没做任何事所以mnotdoinganything,so.好的Clarence要不你来描述下Okay,Clarence,urn,whydon'tyoudescribe第一♥期♥夏日PaWnee特辑thefirstSummerPawneeCatalog.我记得第一年我们提供四门课Iremember.Thatfirstyearweofferedfourclasses.我实际上教的是整理家务IactuallytaughtHomemaking.女人当时不让上课Womenwerenotallowedtoteachbackthen.真的吗我觉得在那之前很久就有女教师了Really?Ithoughttherewerefemaleteacherswaybeforethen.我的部门没有Notinmydepartment.时代不同了Well,timeshavechanged.我现在是副主任了mDeputyDirectornow,但我希望有一天能成为部门第一位女主任butmhopingsomedaytobethefirstfemaledirectorofthedepartment.哦我不觉得那是个好主意Oh,Idon'tthinkthat'sagoodidea.女人需要很多血在她们的婴儿中心流动Womenneedalotofbloodtoflowthroughtotheirbabycenters,给脑袋留的就不多了你看whichleaveslesstothebrain,yousee.是的嗯哼确实Yeah.Mmm-hmm.Sure.要是我就会远离领导岗位为了你的安全着想dstayawayfromleadershiproles,foryourownsafety.别别No!No!或许我该写首关于野餐的歌♥MaybeIshouldwriteasongaboutapicnic.哦你怎么想到那个点子的Ooh,where'dyoucomeupwiththatidea?我们现在这个野餐Thepicnicwe'rehaving.我已经有了完美的标题生活就是野餐Ialreadyhavetheperfecttitle.LifeisaPicnic.挺好的或者有你生活就是野餐呢That'sgood.HowaboutLifeisaPicnicwithYou?PeytonManning著名运动员前橄榄球四分卫喔那可以是关于一个女孩子的或者PeytonManningWhoa!Thenitcouldbeaboutagirl.OrPeytonManning!嗯你要帮我写歌♥词吗Hmm.Youwannahelpmewritethelyrics?可以当然Yeah,totally.我们搞完之后该去Tucker's喝酒WeshouldgrabadrinkafterthisatTucker,s.好i矣我乐意听起来很好玩Yeah,Iwoulddothat.Thatsoundsfun.我先回办公室拿点东西IjusthavetogetmyStufffromtheoffice.但那会挺好的Butthat's.That'dbecool.David是什么召唤你来到公园部门的David,whatwasitexactlythatcalledyoutotheParksDepartment?我在公共工程部干了八年Well,IwasinPublicWorksforeightyears.但那边的主任挺年轻QarenCe又老又弱Butthedirectorwasprettyyoung.Clarencewasoldandweak.所以我做了个人事调动挤进来把他推出去了So,Iputinforatransfer,swoopedinandpushedhimout.您要这份工作难道就没有其他原因了Therewasnootherreasonyouwantedthejob?没只有钱和养老金No.Justthemoneyandthepension.实际工作就是个噩梦Theactualjob,sanightmare.我是说谁在乎这些屎啊Imean,whogivesacrapaboutthiscrap.好了David我觉得我们聊够了Well,David,Ithinkwe,vetalkedenough.Mark那很棒Bobby很棒Mark,that'sgreat.Bobby,great.Ann你看起来太惨了糟糕了太糟糕了Ann,youlookmiserable!Terrible.Terrible!怎么了Ann我们在拍啥时尚杂♥志♥还是巧手上妇Comeon,Ann.Whatarewedoing?MaximorGoodHousekeeping?我不知道哪个才是侮辱mnotsurewhichoneistheinsult.嘿如果有谁想要拍摄Hey,ifthere'sanyoneouttherethat'sdoingaphotoshoot关于食用半熟鸡肉危险性的内容aboutthedangersofeatingundercookedchicken,我可以把Ann的电♥话♥给你IcangiveyouAnn'sphonenumber.好的我们休息一下Okay,let,sstopforasecond.Bobby爱你的表现-耶Bobby,1lovehowyouwork.-Yay!你想喝多少果汁就喝吧Youcanhaveasmanyjuiceboxesasyouwant.实际上给我也来一个要举果Infact,grabmeone,too.Makeitanapple.Mark干得好你也能来个果汁Mark,greatjob,youcanhaveajuicebox,too.Ann跟我走走Ann,takeawalkwithme.百万年来我都没觉得你会是这场拍摄的问题Inamillionyears,Ineverthoughtyouwouldbetheproblemwiththisphotoshoot.你不是两小时前才计划拍摄的吗Didn'tyoujustplanthis,like,twohoursago?我就是不理解啊Ijustdon'tgetit长得这么正为啥就不擅长摆造型呢Howcouldsomeonesohotbesobadatlookinghot?很抱歉我不是个专业模特msorrymnotaprofessionalmodel.而尖叫”让你的脸好看点”也帮不上忙Andscreaming,"Makeyourfacebetter!"doesn'thelp.我很抱歉但你的脸不管用Well,msorry,yourfacejustisn'tworking.我们需要做点啥来转移这个无聊区域的注意力AndWeneedtodosomethingtodistractfromthisboringarea.我也不想这么做的但我们必须拍裸照了Now,Ididn'twanttohavetodothis,butwemayhavetogonude.再见TomGoodbye,Tom!好吧我完全理解Fairenough.Itotallyunderstand.但安全保证还是要拍一张ButWeshouldgetoneforsafety.好了伙计们马上到了就在那上面Okay,guys.We'realmostthere.It'srightuphere.你真不应该带领我们Youreallyshouldn'tbeleadingus.如果你在经期会吸引熊Ifyou'remenstruating,you'llattractbears.我的天啊好吧HolyGod.Okay.我们到了Hereweare.吃的Eat.确实跟我期待的不太一样Well,ithasn'tgoneexactlyasvehoped.但我把他们都拉过来了会有场美妙的野餐ButIgotthemallhereandwe'regonnahaveabeautifulpicnic.会会好的It,sgonna.It'sgonnabegood.Hey.我刚刚尿在蝴蝶上了Ijustwhizzedonabutterfly!先生们你们知道Well,gentlemen,asyouknow,我在写夏日特辑的欢迎辞mworkingonmywelcomeletterfortheSummerCatalog.你把Eagleton的借用过来就行YoushouldjustcopytheEagletonone.我一直都借用Eagleton的IusedtojustcopytheEagletonone.是吗我希望可能你能跟我Didyou?Iwashopingthatmaybeyoucouldtalktome说一下你当主任之后部门如何改变的alittlebitabouthowthedepartmenthaschangedsinceyouranit.我觉得你维护公园的工作做得非常好Well,Ithinkyou'vedoneawonderfuljobmaintainingtheparks.谢谢您Michael我很感激Thankyou,Michael.Iappreciatethat.您掌舵的感觉很享受吗Didyouenjoyyourturnatthehelm?哦还行吧Oh,inaway.坐办公室不是我想做的Pencilpushingwasn'treallymything,但我喜欢公园本身butIdidlovetheparksthemselves.那是这份工作最好的部分-哦不是么我完全同意Thatwasthebestpartofthejob.-Oh,isn'tit?Itotallyagree.感谢您的善良Well,thankgoodnessforyou.是的感谢Michael的善良Yes,thankgoodnessforMichael.顺便问F你现在还在假释期吧Areyoustillonparole,bytheway?哦哈哈很好笑RonOh,ha,ha.Veryfunny