ParksandRecreation《公园与游憩(2009)》第三季第十五集完整中英文对照剧本.docx
嘿女士们先生们第一天来兼♥职♥工作的是Hey,ladiesandgentlemen,forthefirsttimeeverinhernewpart-timejob市政厅公共卫&hearts性♥部♥新雇员AnnMeredithPerkins耶inthePublicHealthDepartmentatCityHall,it'sAnnMeredithPerkins!Yay!Leslie这也太好了1.eslie,thisissonice!我在这些气球里打了一个含毒气的Iputapoisonousgasinoneoftheseballoons,所以炸了一个你可能就死掉了soifanyofthempops,youmaydie.不April我们都会死的No,April,wewouldalldie.气体会充满它们所在的容器体积Gasesfillthevolumeofwhatevercontainerthey'rein.知识哦School.我们在你第一天的每个小时都安排了活动Wehaveactivitieseveryhouronyourfirstday.早上10点Ann的首日华夫饼大爆♥炸♥10:00am,"Ann'sfirstdaywaffleexplosion.'1早11点文书开始庆祝会11:00a.m.,"Thestart-paperworkjamboree."然后正午12点整是就职诞-Ann舞会Andthen12:00noonsharpistheinaugural"D-Ann-ceParty."欢迎来到市政厅小蛋糕WelcometoCityHall,cupcake!你们有几个人在里面啊-七个Howmanyofyouareinhere?-There'sseven.你还有个办公室同事他名叫Stuart他是个扫兴鬼Andyouhaveanofficemate.HisnameisStuart,andhe'skindofagrouch.我还有同事呢Ihaveanofficemate?妈的快把这些气球搞出去Getthesefuckingballoonsoutofhere.你好我是AnnHi,mAnn.公园与游憩公园与游憩第3季第15集第3季第15集嘿-嘿Hey.-Hey.就是说一声我把老年中心的项目给DOnna了Justtoletyouknow,IgavetheseniorcenterprojecttoDonna.听起来不错2点开会吗Soundsgood.Themeeting'sat2:00?是的会议室CYes.Conferenceroom,'C".好的我觉得某个时候Okay.Ithinkatsomepoint,你跟我可能得和彼此亲一下了youandIshouldprobablymakeoutwitheachother.是的好决定Yeah,goodcall.任何关系的开端总是最棒的Thebestpartofanyrelationshipisthebeginning.没有问题没有吵架Noproblems,nofights.只有白葡萄酒拥抱Justwhitewine,cuddling,和海量的历史频道纪录片andcrazyamountsofHistoryChanneldocumentaries.嘿我们今晚去餐厅最好不坐一辆车Hey,Weshouldtakeseparatecarstotherestauranttonight.Chris对此认真得要命.我知道Chrisisdeadlyseriousaboutthis.-1know.我不想聊这个事好么我们晚上见Ijustdon'twannatalkaboutit,okay?llseeyoutonight.好哦对我要和MarleneGriggs-Knope见个面Okay.Oh,bytheway,IhaveameetingwithMarleneGriggs-Knope.她跟你有关系吗Isthatanyrelation?没No.哦好吧0h,okay.就是个巧合我们总这样我们还笑呢Justacoincidence.Wegetitallthetime.Welaughaboutit.但我从没见过她Butvenevermether.她是菲律宾人好拜She'sFilipino.Okay,bye.为什么你不直接告诉Ben她是你妈妈Whydon'tyoujusttellBenshe'syourmother?因为Ben和我现在在这个太棒的小泡泡里BecauseBenandIareinthisamazinglittlebubblerightnow,没有空间留给Chris不让我们约会的盘规矩andthere'snoroominhereforChris,stupidrulesaboutusnotdating或者我那个捏爆蛋的妈ormyball-bustingmother.1.eslie对不起但我觉得你没想清楚1.eslie,msorry,butIdon,tthinkyouthoughtthisthrough.你知道我该怎么做吗YouknowwhatIshoulddo?我该给我妈买♥♥一张去伦敦的单程票今天出发Ishouldgetmymotheraone-waytickettoLondon,leavingtoday.那样Ben就不需要见到她Andthatway,Benneverhastomeether我还能去伦敦看她所有人都赢了andIcouldvisitherinLondon.Everybodywins.如果他看到你桌上她的照片呢Whatifheseesapictureofheronyourdesk?如果Marlene说嘿你见过我女儿LeSlie吗"WhatifMarlenesays,"Hey,haveyoumetmydaughter,Leslie?”她在公园部工作”"SheworksintheParksDepartment."Stuart拜托请你给我们45分钟好吗Stuart,please,couldyougiveus,like,45minutes?这也是我的办公室啊-StuartIt'smyoffice,too.-Stuart.那个家伙真没礼貌Thatguywasrude.我感觉一些结构的变化Ifeelthatsomestructuralchanges真的可以挖掘这个部门的潜力couldreallyunlockthisdepartment'spotential.Jerry-嗯)erry.-Mmm?我相信你的能力不止于此Ibelieveyouarecapableofmuchmore.我没有胡说mnot.-Nonsense.看看镜子-哈1.ookinthemirror.-Huh?你是个智慧的有魅力的美丽的超级英雄Youareanintelligent,charismatic,beautifulsuperhero.我认命你为公共关系负责人mmakingyouheadofPublicRelations,这意味着你要主持日常简报whichmeansyou'llbeleadingthedailybriefingsessions.很好的主意Excellentidea.这是新市政经理上任我最喜欢的部分Thisismyfavoritepartabouthavinganewcitymanager.他们总是试图做点改变而他们的想法都太烂Theyalwaystrytoshakethingsup,andtheirideasareterrible,最后会让市政厅停摆anditbringsCityHalltoagrindinghalt.我就买♥♥几个甜甜圈坐稳了看好戏Ijustgrabafewdonuts,sitback,andenjoytheshow.April只做Ron的助手不足以体现你的价值April,youaretoovaluabletojustbeRon'sassistant.从现在开始你是个多任务行政助理协助整个办公室Sofromnowon,youareamultitaskingexecutiveaide,assistingtheentireoffice.这是个噩梦吗Isthisanightmare?April醒醒April,wakeup.Tom我只想说你是个称职的员工和一个了不起的人Tom,Ijustwannasaythatyouareawonderfulemployeeandaterrifichumanbeing.散会了Meetingadjourned!TomTom.我很欣赏你Ienjoyyou.你知道我还欣赏什么吗你的创业精神YouknowwhatelseIenjoy?Yourentrepreneurialspirit.我最近确实以十块钱的价格卖♥♥掉了我的星际传奇2DVDIdidrecentlysellmyChroniclesOfRiddickDVDoneBayfor$10.用利润买♥♥了个蓝♥光♥版UsedtheprofitstobuytheBlu-ray.那太棒了我有个符合你才能的好项目That'sterrific.Ihaveanamazingprojectforsomeoneofyourtalents.你要把四楼所有的城市档案数字化Youaregoingtodigitizetheentirecityarchivesuponthefourthfloor.不我恨四楼我上次去的时候No!Ihatethefourthfloor!LasttimeIwasupthere,看到有人从自动贩卖♥♥机里买♥♥冰♥毒♥那是个坏地方Isawsomeonebuycrystalmethoutofavendingmachine.It,sabadplace.你不会一个人的AndyYouwon'tbealone.Andy.现在开始你不给任何人做擦鞋男孩Startingnow,youarenobody,sshoeshineboy.现在开始你是一个行政助理Startingnow,youareanadministrativeassistant做三周然后回去擦鞋Forthreeweeks.Thenbacktoshoes.ChrisChris!我没有超级注意你刚刚说我们要做什么Iwasn'tsuperpayingattentiontowhatyoujustsaidthatwe,llbedoing,但我会付出110%的努力的butIwillgive110percent!嗯在你以更有趣的方式重复一遍之后Well,assoonasyourepeatyourselfinamoreinterestingway.嘿BenHey,Ben.嘿怎么了Hey,what'sup?没什么既然我在这我只想让你知道Nothingmuch.Sincemhere,IjustwantedtoletyouknowMarIeneGriggs-Knope是我妈thatMarleneGriggs-Knopeismymom.什么为什么.What?Why.还有她可能会很残酷很难搞Also,shecanbecruelanddifficult,她会快速地对人做出持续很久的判断andshemakessnapjudgmentsaboutpeoplethatsheholdsontoforaverylongtime.而且她有点欺负人Andshe'skindofabully.好吧进去吧你会表现得很好的Okay!Gointhere,you'regonnabegreat.天哦天哦天对不起给对不起God.Oh,myGod.Oh,myGod.msorry.Here.Sorry!你好Hello.我是BenWyatt先生mMr.BenWyatt.看起来你咖啡上沾了点衣服啊1.ookslikeyougotsomeshirtonyourcoffee.是啊你知道发生了什么吗Yeah.Youknowwhathappened?我洒了但你知道是怎么回事Ispilledit,butyouknowhowitgoes.有趣的轶事啊Funanecdote.郡校区需要四辆新校车Thecountyschooldistrictneedsfournewschoolbuses.我被董事会阻碍了希望你们办公室能帮忙mbeingstonewalledbytheboard,andmhopingyourofficecanhelpusout.好Okay.真的吗就这样吗Really?That'sit?是啊实际上不是这Yeah.Actually,no.It.这应该不太可能It,sprobablynotpossible.那我就糊涂了BenThenmconfused,Ben,因为你刚刚告诉我可以的becauseyoujusttoldmeitwas.五秒钟之前Fivesecondsago.我买♥♥了第二盒甜甜圈如果有人Igotasecondboxofdonuts,ifanybody.这他妈是什么Whatthefuckisthis?这主任先生是你的新桌子This,Mr.Director,isyournewdesk.好吧Okay.这个桌子是瑞典概念质mst铝Idhet”的象征ThisdeskistheepitomeoftheSwedishconceptofjamstalldhe或者“平等”or"equality."想象有人需要你的注意Imaginesomeoneneedsyourattention.谁喊下我的名字Somebodysaymyname.ChrisChris.转什么事JerrySwivel!Whatisit,Jerry?你让我喊你的名字Youtoldmetosayyourname.而你做得很棒超级明星Andyoudidagreatjob,superstar.另一个谁说点什么Someoneelsesaysomething.你看起来像个怪人Youlooklikeafreak.转Swivel!APril这可不是好态度April,thatisnotaverygoodattitude.我会盯着你的Iwillkeepmyeyeonyou就从我这个能看见一切的旋转桌子上frommycirculardeskwhereIcanseeeverything.小小旋转看到怎么做了吗Tinyswivel.Seehowitworks?那我的办公室和它的几面墙呢Whataboutmyofficeanditsmanywalls?那成为了新的公共等待室Thatbecomesanewpublicwaitingroom.我们把你门前的那个大柱子也拆掉了AndWegotridofthatgiantpillarthatwasinfrontofyourdoor.我爱那个柱子Ilovedthatpillar.它让站在我门口变得很讨厌Itmadeitreallyannoyingtostandinmydoorway.嗯接受吧因为它已经没了Well,getoverit,becauseit'sgone.你将会比过去更容易接近You'regonnabemoreaccessiblethanever.四楼小额索赔法庭Thefourthfloor.Smallclaimscourt,离婚登记州立毒品检测divorcefilings,state-ordereddrugtests.居然同时又冷又潮湿lt,ssomehowbothfreezingandhumid.四楼有一整个房♥间There'sawholeroomonthefourthfloor放着他们没收的来四楼捅人时用的刀子wheretheystoretheknivesthey'veconfiscatedfrompeoplewhowenttothefourthfloortostabsomeone.你们是公园娱乐部吗-是啊YoufromParksandRec?-Yeah.我给你们介绍下mheretoshowyouaround.很高兴见到你女士您的名字是Nicetomeetyou,ma'am.What'syourname?EthelBeavers跟着我EthelBeavers.Followme.好了你们到了Okay,thisisyou.哦哇Oh,wow!两台电脑吗Doublecomputers?我有自己的办公室电♥话♥了Igetmyownofficephone.你好哇华尔街Heno,WallStreet.买♥♥点股票现在Buymorestocks.Now.这个电♥话♥闻起来像屁♥股♥Thisphonekindofsmellslikeabutt.尽量别挪东西Trynottomovethingsaround.因为严格来说这里还是个犯罪现场Becausetechnicallyspeaking,thisisstillacrimescene.这是你们的名牌Here'syournametags.给Here.Ethel这件衬衫可是Theory的Ethel,thisshirtisfromTheory.名牌会戳洞的我才不戴呢Nametagsmakeholes.mnotwearingthis.随便你了Dowhatyouwant.拜Ethel-该死Bye,Ethel!-Damnit.下次提醒我问她林肯被枪击的时候她在哪RemindmenexttimetoaskherwhereshewaswhenLincolngotshot.”提醒.Tom问啥”"Remind.Tom.Ask.Something."搞定了老板Yougotit,boss.嘿某人给某人做了个混音带Hey!Somebodymadesomebodyamix!我当然听取了你上次的意见AndIdefinitelyheardyourfeedbackfromlasttime,所以我只放了五首SarahMcLachlan在里面soIonlyputfiveSarahMcLachlansongsonthisone.酷哦我们是不是该聊聊你为何称你妈是个你没见过的菲律宾人Cool.ShouldwetalkabouthowyouclaimedyourmomwasaFilipinowomanyou'dnevermet?要聊吗Shouldwe?我只是想拖延避免不了的事Iwasjusttryingtodelaytheinevitable.如果这段关系认真了Ifthisturnsintosomethingreal,我们就必须面对ChriS的规矩thenwearegonnahavetodealwithChris'rule,还有父母讨厌的牙线习惯andparents,andannoyingflossinghabits,还有一堆不有趣的事情andalotofun-funstuff.但现在还没Butnotyet.我只想享受一下下那个泡泡Ijustwanttoenjoythebubbleforalittlewhile.对不起msorry.一切还好吗-不不好Everything1Sgood?-No,it,snot.我完全慌了我表现得像个白♥痴♥一样Iwascompletelyflustered.Icameofflikeanidiot.有一个时候毫无理由地1mean,atonepoint,fornoreason,我把鞋子脱下来捡在手上了Ijusttookoffmyshoesandheldtheminmyhand.我去问问她经过如何我赌她爱死你了mgonnagoaskherhowitwent,andIbetshelovedyou.我爱死他了1lovedhim!他太好说话了He,satotalpushover.虽然是很奇怪的人Veryoddguy,though.他就像是只愚蠢懦弱的水母He'slikeagoofy,spinelessjellyfish.为啥你要问啊亲爱的Whydoyouask,sweetheart?没啥Noreason.别担心完全没问题的Don'tworryaboutit.It'stotallyfine.不有问题No,it'snotfine.如果她开始到处告诉人我好说话呢Whatifshestartsgoingaroundtellingpeoplemapushover?没人会相信的Noone,sgonnabelievethat.我第一次遇见你我觉得你是个法♥西♥斯♥式的狠角色WhenIfirstmetyou,Ithoughtyouwereafascisthard-ass.什么-一个可爱的法♥西&hearts撕♥狠角色What?-Acutefascisthard-ass,但还是你散发着一种butstill,yougiveoffavery.教&hearts清♥部♥门现在IE式要求10辆校车EducationDepartmentnowofficiallyrequesting10schoolbuses.我以为他们只想要4辆的1thoughttheyonlywantedfour.嗯现在我好说话了为啥不要10辆20辆Well,nowthatmapushover,whynotaskfor10,or20,或者一百辆新校车还有一个舰队呢or100newschoolbusesandafleetofschoolyachts?这样怎样我们现在要做的是Howaboutthat?Here'swhatwe,regonnado.你要告诉我所有关于你妈需要知道的事情Youaregonnatellmeeverythingthereistoknowaboutyourmom.我要跟她再见一次面Andmgonnahaveanothermeetingwithher,我们要好好来一场andwe,regonnahaveitout.或者我们去伯利兹玩潜水OrwecouldgotoBelizeandgoscubadiving.我们还可以去看鲸鲨Andwecouldlookatthewhalesharks.你有证吧我们可以让你学You'recertified,right?Let,sgetyoucertified.April我要的使川报告你搞好了吗April,doyouhavethatusagereportthatIaskedfor?乐意为你做任何事JenyAnythingforyou,Jerry.谢谢Thankyou.你会失败的哦拜托为什么啊Oh,comeon.Why?打扰了Excuseme.Ramsett公园有个标语说“别喝洒水器里的水”There'sasignatRamsettParkthatsays"Donotdrinkthesprinklerwater,"所以我用它做了太阳茶现在我感染了soImadesunteawithit,andnowIhaveaninfection.先生Sir?先生你你在听我说话吗先生Sir,are.Areyoulisteningtome,sir?先生我在和你说话呢Sir,I'mtalkingtoyou!先生Sir!先生你意识到Sir,areyouaware你们的水系统有废水吗thatthereiswasteinyourwatersystem?好的你需要表现得坚强有力果断Okay,youneedtobestrong,powerful,decisive.这不是会面这是场战斗Thisisnotameeting.It,sabattle.通常的会面规则不适用Normalmeetingrulesdonotapply.我扮作我妈我会对你很严厉llbemymomandmgonnabeveryharshwithyou,但这只是因为我很喜欢你andit'sonlybecauseIlikeyoualot.好的-开始Okay.-Go!你好-错了Hello.-Wrong.什么不要寒暄不要介绍What?-Nopreambles.Nointroductions.直接进来开始说Justwalkinandstarttalking.我想讨论下校车的问题dliketodiscussthenewschoolbus.我想讨论下你的押韵问题呢苏斯博士dliketodiscussyourrhyming,Dr.Seuss.你现在应该已经坐下了-什么Andyoushouldbesittingbynow.-What?就走进来直接坐下Justwalkinandtakeaseat.嗯-"嗯"是"蠢"的声音Um.-"Um"isthesoundin"dumb."那是她跟别人说的That'swhatshesaystopeople.然后你现在翘着二郎腿跟个女人似的Andnowyou'vecrossedyourlegslikeawoman.天啊好了我们应该从头开始吗God!Okay,shouldwejuststartover?不不我们得先标记一下No.No,weneedtoputapininthis.这是我妈最喜欢的100个聊天话题Hereisalistofmymother'stop100favoriteconversationtopics,从波斯地榛开始以DanieICraig结束startingwithPersianrugs,endingwithDanielCraig.你有十分钟的时间记卜来Youhave10minutestomemorizeit.生死狂澜电影吗-嗯哼Deliverance,themovie?-Mmm-hmm.哦天啊Oh,God.所以Jerry现在基本上是我的老板了SoJerryis,like,basicallymybossnow,我是永远不会给他干活的whichmnevergonnaworkforhim.Ron困在了这个诡异的桌子监狱里Ron'strappedinthisweirddeskprison,而我现在在这个移♥动♥输液台工作了andInowworkatthistravelingIVstation.这是MortJansen的办公室吗ThisMortJansen1Soffice?不是Nope.跟Mort说“轮到你了”TellMortIsaid"Yourmove."我的天我想跟你们在这上班这也太棒了0h,myGod.Iwannaworkupherewithyouguys.Thisisawesome.还有多少需要你扫描的蠢文件啊Howmanymoreofthosestupiddocumentsdoyouhavetoscan?就只有这一盒和其他所有那些盒Justthisone,andalltheonesinthoseboxes.我得马上出去了Igottagetoutofherepronto.到了让这些老女士们给我帮忙干活的时候了Timetogetthoseoldladiestodomyworkforme.怎么做呢用Haverford魅力光线闪耀她们How?ByshiningdownonthemwiththeHaverfordcharmray.哎呀哎呀哎呀Well,well,well.这不是EthelBeavers嘛Ifitisn'tEthelBeavers.怎么啦美人What'sup,beautiful?JulianneMoore刚刚打来了她想把她的头发要问去JulianneMoorejustcalled.Shewantsherhairback.没有叫JUlien的打来过啊NobodynamedJuliencalled.没事了我只想问你几个问题Nevermind.Ijustneedtoaskyouacoupleofquestions.第一你能在现在我们的项目上帮我点忙吗One,canyouhelpmeoutwiththisprojectwe'redoing?还有第二And,two,你能邀请我去你的30岁生日聚会吗willyoupleaseinvitemetoyour30thbirthdayparty?你在干嘛Whatareyoudoing?我在测试给你打电♥话♥保证没问题mmakingatestcalltoyourphonetomakesureit,sworking所以你不会再错过来电了soyoudon'tmissanymorecalls.你知道吗算了Youknowwhat?Don'tbother.要不我就找个开窗跳下去摔死吧Maybelljustfindanopenwindowandplummettomydeath.好啊Okay.这行不通的Thisisn'tgonnawork.好吧你刚刚不是在我正在说话的时候转过去了吧Okay,youdidnotjustswivelawaywhileIwastalkingtoyou.这个飞船键盘要把我整疯rThisspaceshipkeyboardisdrivingmecrazy.我一分钟只能打一个词了mdowntoonewordaminute,那个词是"perflipisklup"andthewordis,perflipisklup"因为我不能开飞船becauseIcan'tflyspaceships.Donna你跟我都知道这些市政经理的改动总会慢慢消散的Donna,youknowaswellasIdothesecitymanagershakeupsalwayspeterout.你只需要等着就行Youjusthavetowait.通常我同意你Usuallymwithyou.无敌金刚1974年播出的宇航员超级英雄电视剧但这位是ChrisTraeger无敌金刚啊ButthisisChrisTraeger,thesixmilliondollarman.他不会放弃的Hewon'tquit.所以你要做的是把你自己转到他办公室跟他来两句Soyouneedtoswivelyourassdowntohisofficeandhaveawordwithhim.妈咪-哦Mommy.-Oh!这也太周到了Thatissothoughtfulofyou.当然Ofcourse!我就觉得嘿为啥不让我妈心情好一点呢Ijustfigured,hey,whynotputmymotherinagoodmood?所以我了解到哪怕我们会面时我已说过So,it,smyunderstandingthatdespitewhatIsaidinourmeeting,您依然增加了您对校车数量的要求youhavesomehowincreasedyourrequestformoreschoolbuses.抱歉我在和我女儿喝咖啡呢Excuseme,butmhavingcoffeewithmydaughter.或许我们另找时间谈吧Maybewecoulddothisanothertime.不我们现在就要谈这个No,we'regonnatalkaboutthisnow.或者你可以选择Orifyou'dprefer,让我永久冻结教♥育♥部♥门的预算Icouldputapermanentfreezeontheeducationbudget你决定It,syourcall.哇或许你该跟他聊他看起来很有自信呢Wow,maybeyoushouldtalktohim,Mom.Heseemsprettyself-assured.什么都没剩下There'snothingleft.都结束:了It'sover.嘿嘿嘿别这么说现在来Hey,hey,hey,don'tsaythat.Now,comeon.整理好你自己Getyourselftogether然后出去做你一直知道能做的那个女人andgooutthereandbethewomanyoualwaysknewyoucouldbe.太感谢你了Thankyousomuch.那是谁啊Whowasthat?我也不知道Idon'tknow.我看到她在哭我就去帮了忙Isawhercrying,andsoIhelped.你想跟我讲什么来着Whatdidyouwannatalktomeabout?听着Chris我很荣幸你能考虑给我这个很棒的机会1.ook,ChriS,I'mveryflatteredyouthoughtofmeforthisamazingopportunity,但我真不知道这事儿是不是我擅长的butIdon'treallyknowifthisgigisinmywheelhouse.我倾向F和年轻有魅力的人一起做事Itendtoworkbestwithyoung,attractivepeople.Tom我让你当项目负责人Tom,Ihavemadeyouaprojectl