ParksandRecreation《公园与游憩（2009）》第五季第十四集完整中英文对照剧本.docx
公园与游憩前情提要这是最好的晚上Thisisthebestnightever.我希望我们今晚就能结婚IwishWeweregettingmarriedtonight.那我们就来吧1.et'sjustdoitthen.1.eslie.1.eslie.我们结婚吧1.et'sgetmarried.今晚Tonight.我们真的要来吗-我想-Arewereallydoingthis?-1gue-为何不呢Whynot?宴会11点结束Thegalaendsat11:00.11:01我们结婚At11:01,wegetmarried.好吧但等等我妈不在这啊Okay.But,wait,mymomisn'there.而且你的父母也不在-很好Andyourparentsaren'there.-Good.是啊那就更好了Yeah,thatmakesitbetter.但我们5月16号♥预定了场地ButwereservedaspaceforMay16th.而且我们刚刚卜单r2oo顶白巧克力礼中AndWejustordered200white-chocolatetophats.我们订了吗-你订的实际I二Wedid?-Youdid,actually.是在你名下的It,sunderyourname.1.eSlie我们可以5月16号♥结婚1.eslie,wecangetmarriedMay16th,或者6月1号♥orJune1st,或者7月57号♥orJuly57th.但不是感觉挺对吗今天Butdoesn'titfeelright,today?是啊确实是Yeah,itdoes.你没说一次感觉就更对了Everytimeyousayit,itjustfeelsmoreright.哦我的天我们今晚要结婚了Oh,myGod,we'regettingmarriedtonight.这也太棒了-是啊Thisisreallygreat.-Yeah.你要么来要么不来了兄弟You'reeitherinoryourout,buddy.是我的主意我完全来啊Itwasmyidea,mtotallyin.等等不对我们不能-今天是我们结婚的日子Wait,no.Wecan't-thisisourweddingday.这是非常厄运的转过身去Thisisverybadluck,turnaround.我们不能看到对方Wecan'tlookateachother!嗯你意识到我们今天已经看到对方好几次了吧Well,youareawarethatwe,veseeneachotherseveraltimestoday.我们有两个小时搞定Wehavetwohourstodothis.我要你集♥合♥所有人Iwantyoutogeteveryonetogether,十分钟后在Ann家集♥合♥andmeetmeatAnn'shouseintenminutes.好的哦等等在我们结婚之前Okay.Oh,wait,beforewegetmarried,还有很重要的事情要讨论thereissomethingweneedtodiscuss.我是说我们从没聊过Imean,we'venevertalkedaboutit,但我真的想让你随我的姓butIreallywantyoutotakemylastname.哦哦Oh!Oh.好吧真的吗Okay.Really?是啊这真的对我很重要Yeah,it,sjustreallyimportanttome,象征性地symbolically,1.eslieKnope消失thatLeslieKnopedisappears然后变成LeslieWyattandbecomesLeslieWyatt.或者女议员BenWyatt夫人那也可以OrCouncilwomanMrs.BenWyatt.That'sfinetoo.这事没法通融It,sadealbreaker.等等你在玩我吗-对不起必须得试试Wait,areyoumessingwithme?-Sorry,Ihadtogiveitashot.Ben现在走吧跑-好好Ben,nowgo,run!-Okay,okay.等等我要去哪Wait.WheredoIgo?跑Run!公园与游憩公园与游憩第5季第14集第5季第14集猎鹰进来了Thefalconisentering!斑鸠已收到Theturtledoveacknowledges!嘿你在哪呢-我-我在这Hey,whereareyou?-m-mhere.好的我们现在过一遍各人职责Okay,letsgooverthedutiesrightnow.Ann你负责婚纱发型和化妆Ann,you'reinchargeofthedressandthehairandthemakeup.我想的是就AndIwasthinking,like,罗斯福夫人的色♥欲♥thesensualityofEleanorRooseveltCBS新闻主播加上LesleyStahl的野性魅力combinedwiththeanimalmagnetismofLesleyStahl.一块蛋糕小菜一碟Pieceofcake.哦我们还得去取婚礼蛋糕Oh,wehavetogettheweddingcake.那个我也做了lldothattoo.我非常的平静mperfectlycalm.我感觉Leslie让我做过的每一件疯狂的事情就像是演习IfeellikeeverycrazythingLeslie'severhadmedohasbeen,likeadrill,而今天就是来真的了andtodayistherealthing.我准备好了因为我的老师是全世界最棒的mready,becauseIhadthegreatestteacherintheworld.1.eslie1.eslie.她太疯Whoiscrazy.还有我们需要戒指和结婚证Also,weneedringsandmarriagelicenses.哦让我负责戒指我爱它们的象征意义-很好Oh,letmebeonrings.Ilovewhattheysymbolize.-Great.我可以搞定结婚证我有个家伙在市政厅E班AndIcandothelicense.IgotaguythatworksatCityHall.那个家伙是我老婆Thatguy'smywife.呃你也在那上班啊-哦对哦Um,youalsoworkthere.-Oh,yeah.Ron我需要你挽着我走上红毯Ron,mgonnaneedyoutowalkmedowntheaisle.是我的荣幸Itwouldbeanhonor.也会是我第一次不后悔走上红毯AndthefirsttimeIwon'tregretwalkingdowntheaisle.哦呃哎呀Oh,uh,yikes.我们还需要一位主祭我来Weneedanofficiant.-1gotthis.在网上被认命为牧师只需要就五分钟Youcanbecomeanordainedministeronlinein,like,fiveminutes.脱口秀节目主持人你想走SteveHarvey风呢DoyouwantmorelikeaSteveHarveyvibe美国偶像主持人还是直接来Seacrestorstraight-upSeacrest?呃无所谓了Nuh!Nevermind.我合并起来-Steve-Crestllcombine'em-Steve-crest.好的还有呃Jerry和Donna我需要你们Okay,and,um,JerryandDonna,Ineedyouguys保证宴会进展顺利tojustmakesurethatthegalarunssmoothly.我们一个小时之后在这里碰头1.et'ssaythatwe'reallgonnameetbackhereinanhour.我爱你们所有人123解散Iloveallofyou.One,two,three,break!打扰一下Excuseme.我们在寻找一堆结婚戒指We'relookingforacoupleweddingrings.你们要看的是珠宝和钉子盘You'regonnawannalookthroughthejewelryandnailstray.里面有些美丽的珠宝Thereissomebeautifuljewelryinhere.但小心了Butbecareful.里面还有钉子There'salsonails.哦哦这对不错啊Oh!Oh,thesearen'tbad.那俩真的挺好Thosearerealnice.它们曾经是乳环来着Andtheywerenipplerings,atonepoint.你是怎么知道的Howdoyouknowthat?嗯-是你的Mm.-Theywereyours.是他的Theywerehis.我们走1.et'sgo.嘿挺疯狂的我明天就要当个条子了Hey,it'sprettycrazy,mgonnabeacoptomorrow.我猜我今晚最好把能犯的罪都犯了IguessIbettercommitasmanycrimesaspossibletonight.完全发泄出来Getitoutofmysystem.哦结婚证找到了Ooh,foundthemarriagelicenses.我要把它们都拿走AndIamgoingtotakeallofthem.我不想让这个镇上任何人再结婚了1don'twantanyoneelseinthistowntogetmarried,因为那样我们就没那么特别rbecauseitmakesitlessspecialforus.好决定宝Goodcall,babe.开路-好1.et'sroll.-Okay.我没事mgood!还没做完It'snotfinished.为什么女裁缝还没做完呢Whydidn'ttheseamstressfinishit?如果你不能提前三个月完成的话Ifyou'renotgonnafinishsomethingthreemonthsearly,那就别接活啊thendon'tacceptthejob.肯定有什么我们能做的There'sgottobesomethingwecando.这场婚礼是注定的我们会想到的Thisweddingismeanttobe.We'regonnafigureitout.灰姑娘是怎么那么快做好裙子的NowhowdidCinderellafinishherdresssofast?松鼠和小鸟-嗯Squirrelsandbirds.-Mm.可没帮上忙-没That'snotveryhelpful.-No.嘿我们搞到了-我们搞到了Hey,wegotit!-Wegotit.结婚证搞定Marriagelicensedone.等等等一下Waitaminute,holdon.需要市政职员办公室谁的签字ItneedstobesignedbysomebodyattheCityClerk'sOffice.我伪造就好啊lljustforgeit.我一直都在伪造政♥府♥文件来着Iforgegovernmentdocumentsallthetime.确实-哈That'strue.-Boom.不No.嘿-嘿Hey.-Hey.所以我们没找到戒指Sowedidn'tfindanyrings.是啊我们这里有几个障碍Yeah,we'rehavingafewroadblockshere.感觉这一切正在慢慢瓦解了Kindoffeelslikethisthingisfallingapart.别慌Don'tpanic.我发誓我妈给我的这个老物盒里肯定有戒指Iswearthere'ssomeringsinthisoldboxofstuffmymomgaveme.还放在April和Andy的房♥子这里StillhereatAprilandAndy'shouse.想帮我找找吗Wanttocomehelpmelook?好的Ann婚纱使命April和Andy证件使命Okay,Ann,dressduty.AprilandAndy,licenseduty.动词没空了Notimeforverbs.我知道你很匆忙LeslieIknowyou'reinarush,Leslie.我得指出你说了“屎”这个词两次Ishouldpointoutthatyousaid"doodie"twice.好吧Okay.嗷该死这边生意兴隆啊Aw,shucks,businessisa-boomin,.印第安纳名人模仿秀Indianacelebritylook-alikes.我是说这个主意也太棒了Donna1mean,thisisabrilliantidea,Donna.我最爱的都在这了Allmyfavoritesarehere.爆米花创始人/迈克尔杰克逊家族成员摇滚歌♥手我们有OrVilIeRedenbaCherLaToyaJacksonWegotOrvilleRedenbacher,LaToyaJackson,枪花乐队主唱/脱口秀主持人AxlRoseDavidLettermanAxlRose,DavidLetterman.听着谁也别说1.ook,don'ttellanyone,但我预定了一个特别的惊喜butIbookedaspecialsurprise.有个Li'lSebastian的模仿马在路上了-咋滴There'saLi,lSebastianlook-alikeontheway-what?什么哦我的-What?Oh,myG-哦哦Oh!Oh.你刚刚尿裤子了吗Didyoujustpeeyourpants?就一点点Justadab.我最好去清理一下Ibettergocleanup.你好下流啊JerryYounasty,Jerry.这周第三次了Thirdtimethisweek.哦什么鬼啊-发生什么了Oh,whatthehell!-What'swrong?“你的牧师证将在24小时之内Email给你”"YourMinisterCertificationwillbeemailedtoyouin24hours."呃但这可是美国啊Uhh!ButthisisAmerica.我现在就要Iwantitnow!抱歉Tom会有这种事的Sorry,Tom,that'swhathappens.我给这场婚礼都写好了各种神段子啊Ihadallthesegreatbitswrittenfortheweddingtoo.我还准备B-Box的Iwasgonnabeatbox.还要有街舞的There'sadancebreakdown.我是在说保证六次鼓掌打断的那种mtalking,like,sixguaranteedapplausebreaks.呃你知道我实际上已经认证了Uh,youknow,Iamactuallyordained.我可以主持婚礼了Icoulddothewedding.那是我听过最烂的点子了That'stheworstideaveeverheard.是啊你是对的好吧Yeah,you'reright,okay.等等如果你主持仪式Wait!Whatifyoudotheceremony,但你没有属于自己的蠢点子butyoudon'thaveanystupidideasofyourown,你就说我想到的东西呢andyoujustsaytheStuffthatIcameupwith?只要能帮上LeslieAnythingtohelpLeslie.士士兀夫Perfect.现在闭嘴开始记台词Nowshutupandstartmemorizing.我们开场时用的是WillSmith的独白WeopenwithWillSmith'smonologue来自现代电影经典作品fromthemoderncinematicclassic.全民情敌Hitch.斑鸠Turtledove?猎鹰Falcon?斑鸠-猎鹰Turtledove.-Falcon?斑鸠-你屁♥股♥在这呢Turtledove.-There'syourbutt.嘿Hey.你们找到戒指了吗Didyoufindtherings?没有戒指只有个网球手环Norings,justatennisbracelet还有条项链写着“酒妹”andanecklacethatsays"WineChick."没有戒指没有结婚证没有婚纱Norings,nolicense,nodress.这个主意感觉那么对但可能就是太过分了Thisideafeltsoright,butmaybeit,sjusttoocrazy.或许不是注定发生的Maybeitwasn'tmeanttobe.嘿下雪了Hey,it'ssnowing.是他-什么It'shim.-What?谁我看不见Who?Ican'tsee.我不理解这不可能啊Idon'tunderstand,thisisimpossible.什-Wh-哇Whoa.1.i,lSebastian吗1.i,lSebastian?不不抱歉No,no,sorry.实际上这是BuckyActually,thisisBucky.他是呃持证的Li'lSebastian模仿者He,sa,uh,licensedLi,lSebastianimpersonator.我们要去参加宴会We'reheadedtothegala,让乡亲们能和他合照sofolkscanposeforpictureswithhim.200一张如果你们有兴趣的话200apop,ifyou,reinterested.安静你Quiet,you.这就是Li'lSebaStian而且这是个征兆ThisisLi'lSebastian,andthisisasign.我们要来了We'regonnadothis.我们要搞定这场婚礼Wearegonnapullthisweddingoff.走吧Bucky-Li'lSebastianComeon,Bucky.-Li'lSebastian.是的女士Yes,ma'am.我的天哪我们没时间rOhmyGod,we,rerunningoutoftime.Ann拜托跟我说你从头缝好了一条新裙子Ann,please,tellmethatyouhavesewnanewdressfromscratch.或者几条裙子因为我想有得选Orseveraldresses,'causeIwouldlovesomeoptions.我有个注意可能有点太过了Ihaveanidea,anditmightbeinsane,但我最近看了挺多天桥风云的butvebeenwatchingalotProjectRunwayrecently.在最近的八年里Inthepasteightyears.好吧很好所以我信任你加油干吧Okay,great,soItrustyou,andmakeitwork.天桥风云导师没时间模仿TimGunn的声音了NotimetodotheTimGunnvoice.等等我在胡说什么总有时间的Wait,whatam1talkingabout?There'salwaystime.设计师们加油干吧Designers,makeitwork.Ann你还有不到一个小时Ann,youhavelessthananhour.Beavers小妞.这是官方警♥察♥事务MissBeavers,thisisofficialpolicebusiness.希望我们没吵醒你1hopewedidn'twakeyouup.已经过10点了It,safter10:00.我已经睡了4个小时rI'vebeenasleepforfourhours.你们要干啥-我们需要你给这个签字Whatdoyouwant?-Weneedyoutosignthis.是一张结婚证It,samarriagelicense.Ethel是抢劫犯吗Ethel?Isitrobbers?不是回床上吧No,gobacktobed.嗷那是你老公吗AWw,isthatyourhusband?我没结婚我今晚约会mnotmarried.Iwasonadatetonight.情况不错就让他过夜了Itwentwell,he'ssleepingover.酷哦Cool.如果你能签真的意义重大It'dreallymeanalotifyousignit.是给LeslieKnope和BenWyatt的It,sforLeslieKnopeandBenWyatt.我觉得你认识他们Ithinkyouknowthem?S04E09TheTrialofLeslieKnope他们有次把我从冰天雪地中拉出去Theydraggedmeoutinthefreezingcoldonce,所以他们能对彼此说“我爱你”sotheycouldtelleachother,Iloveyou."太烦人了Itwasannoying.哦非常感谢Oh,thankyousomuch!你有个好棒的大房♥子还有真的很酷的睡衣Youhavegotanamazinghouseandareallycoolnightgown看起来超级擅长约会andseemtobesupergoodatdating.是啊所以我们能收养你做我们的奶奶吗Yeah,socanweadoptyouasourgrandma?行酷Fine.-Cool!我们爱你奶奶Weloveyou,Grandma!我想我们可以去个药房♥Iguesswecouldgotoapharmacy,但我真的不想用什么便宜塑料戒指butIreallydon,twanttouselikeacheapplasticring.我不想这么说但AnnPerkins对戒指的品味真的太差了Ihatetosaythis,butAnnPerkinshasterribletasteinrings.这-这是啥啊What-whatisthis?一个有棕色宝石的脚趾戒指吗It'satoeringwithabrowngemstone?这是个变质的红宝石吗Isthisarubythat'sgonebad?我没点子了Iamoutofideas.珠宝店Jewelrystore.不都关门了所以我们才这公做的No,that'sclosed,that'swhywe,redoingthis.或许我能有点用处PerhapsIcanbeofservice.怎么How?你们觉得Ann会多留恋这个灯台呢HowmuchdoyouthinkAnnwouldmissthissconce?哦我不知道啊这可是她房♥子的一部分Oh,Idon'tknow.It'spartofherhouse.嗯好吧Well,okay.”当我听说Ben要结婚的时候我想到的是"WhenIheardBenwasgettingmarried,Iwaslike,“是和Leslie还是权力的游戏啊”,toLeslieortoGameofThrones'?"呃表现得太差了Ugh,horribledelivery."你听过Leslie讨论Ben的屁♥股♥吗"YoueverheardLeslietalkaboutBen,sbutt?“我就像是该死啊妹子"malllike,'damn,girl,你对那块臀肉的兴趣还真是醇厚啊”youmadsweetonthatbackmeat."'你在谋杀我的美丽台词啊You'remurderingmybeautifulwords!你真的想在这场婚礼上一顿乱杀吗Doyouevenwanttokillatthiswedding?我只是想让Leslie和Ben有个美好的夜晚IjustwantLeslieandBentohaveanicenight.我很抱歉我一不不msorry.I-No,no.相信你是我的错It'smyfaultforbelievinginyou.嗯你看嗯要正式的话Well,look,um,tobeofficial,我要做的其实只有誓言和声明的部分Ijusthavetodothevowsandthepronouncement.所以要不你来处理那个讲话Sowhydon'tyouhandlethespeech,然后我在结尾接上呢andthenlljustcomeinattheend?嗯我没有特别喜欢你做事的那个部分Well,mnotcrazyaboutthepartwhereyoudosomething.但我喜欢我做什么的主意But,Idoliketheideamedoingsomething.我们来试试吧1.et'sgiveitashot.大家好Hello,everyone.有点坏消息Gotsomebadnews.宴会11点结束Thegalaendsat11:00.好消息是Thegoodnewsis,在11:01我们要主持一场特别的婚礼仪式at11:01,we'llbeholdingaspecialweddingceremony.邀请所有人留下Everyoneisinvitedtostay.所有饮食我们买♥♥单Allthedrinksandthefoodwillbeonus.嘿一切都还好吗Hey,everythinggoingokay?一切都好极了如果没有那个拿着扩音器的笨蛋的话Everythingwouldbepeachyifitweren'tforthatdumbasswithamegaphone.没人想要公园Noonewantsaparkhere.公园很蠢Parksarestu-pid.嘿黄油牙怎么着Hey,butter-teeth,what'sup?我可以帮你修好那些嚼玩艺儿Icanfixthosechompersforyou.就来Jamm牙科JustcometoJammOrthodontics.Jamm议员你在这干什么CouncilmanJamm,whatareyoudoinghere?你又在这干什么公园很蠢Whatareyoudoinghere?Parksarestu-pid.嘿够了Hey,enough.你最好把那个扩音器还我Youbettergivemebackthatmegaphone.那是我姨的Thatbelongstomyaunt.要不我给你打个车吧Whydon'tIcallyouacab?嗯不这还没结束呢KnopeMm.No,thisisn'tover,Knope.已经结束了我赢得公平公正Itisover.Iwonfairandsquare.而且半个小时之后And,inahalfanhour,我就要在那边和世上最完美的男人结婚了Iamgettingmarriedovertheretothemostperfectmanintheworld.我所有的梦想都要成真了Andallmydreamsarecomingtrue.Knope棒Jamm烂Knoperules,Jammsucks.Knope棒Jamm烂Knoperules,)ammsucks.Knope棒Ja-Howser议员Knoperules,Ja-CouncilmanHowser.1.eslieJeremy1.eslie.Jeremy.你最好保证我姨能把她扩音器拿回去Youbettermakesuremyauntgetshermegaphoneback.好吧我-我搞对了吗Okay,didI-didIdoitright?看起来如何糟糕How'sitlook?-Terrible.而且完美Andperfect.我承诺自己今晚不会哭了1promisedmyselfIwasnotgoingtocrytonight.我已经违背这个承诺五次了AndIhavealreadybrokenthatpromisefivetimes.但我不会有第六次了ButIwillnot.breakitasixth.来释放出来吧兄弟Goaheadandletitout,buddy.没事的It'sokay.我给你准备了点东西-好吧Ihavesomethingforyou.-Allright.是来自州议会的信件.Itistheletterfromthestatehouse.告诉我们被分派到了PawneeTellingusthatwehavebeenassignedtoPawnee.Ben和Chris出场集播出于2010年5月13日日期是2010年5月1日DatedMay1st,2010.不是吧Noway.我们本应在这里呆8周的Weweresupposedtobehereeightweeks.我太高兴那八个星期msohappythatthoseeightweeks变成了三年turnedintothreeyears,而且你认识了LeslieandthatyoumetLeslie,而且我们都找到了一个家andthatwebothfoundahome.该死你把你那个哭的事情传染给我了Damnit,you'retransferringyourcryingthingovertome.没事的兄弟释放出来吧It,sokay,buddy,letitout.我积攒r你职业生涯里所有重要的法案照片文件和备忘录Igatheredupallthemeaningfulbills,pictures,documents,andmemosfromyourcareer.你觉得如何可以吗Whatdoyouthink?Isitokay?这是我见过最棒的物体了ItisthemostbeautifulobjectIhaveeverseen.这就像是裙子里的AnnPerkinsItisliketheAnnPerkinsofdresses.耶Yay.太棒了Itisamazing.准备完毕了Allset.1.eslie哇1.eslie,wow!你看起来太棒了-对吧Youlookamazing.-Right?哦我的天啊-咋Oh,myGod!-What?我婚礼之前不该见到你的mnotsupposedtoseeyoubeforethewedding.不那是新郎我毁rNo,that,sthegroom-1ruinedit!Andy说的是新郎Andy,that'sthegroom.嗯我也见到他了啊Well,1sawhimtoo.我就把眼睛蒙住吧确保安全mjustgonnacovermyeyes,justtobesafe.好吧所以我们外面准备好了Okay,sowe,rereadyoutthere.为了你的婚礼还是啥的Foryourweddingorwhatever.哦天啊结婚证戒指Oh,myGod,thelicense,therings,主祭都搞定了吗theofficiant,everything?是的全部都合流了Yes,itallcametogether.我们走1.et'sgo.呸呸Boo,boo.呸LeslieKnope呸Boo,LeslieKnope,boo.* 呸过来了*JHerecomesthebooJ* 全穿着呸*JAlldressedinbooJ* 呸LeslieKnope*JBoo,LeslieKnopeJ4* 呸呸*JBoo,boo-oo-oo-ooJ呸Boo!大哥你在干嘛啊Dude,whatareyoudoing?我在表现好啊mbeingawesome.呸呸Leslie呸Boo,boo,Leslie,boo.我的朋友我觉得你没理解这个主意有多差Myfriend,Idon'tthinkyouunderstandwhatabadideathisis.我觉得你妹理解Idon'tthinkyouunderstand我能从那家新的大肚汉堡店捞到多少油水that1wouldhavegotacutofthatnewPaunchBurger如果她没把一切搞砸的话ifshehadn'tscrewedeverythingup.太抱歉了伙计们Sosorry,guys!这次婚礼取消了Thisweddingiscanceled,因为新娘是个屁'causethebrideisab-hole.怎么说话呢来看看吧Hey!-Checkthisout.臭气弹谁知道那是干嘛的Stinkbomb!Whoknowswhatthatdoes?哦Ohl臭气弹吗你在开玩笑吧Stinkbomb?Areyoujoking?我的天哪Oh,myGod!你是从哪弄来这玩意
