ParksandRecreation《公园与游憩（2009）》第四季第六集完整中英文对照剧本.docx

LeslieKnope小姐向您介绍HerbScaiferMissLeslieKnope,IpresenttoyouHerbScaifer.再说一次Andy你不用鞠躬Again,Andy,youdon'tneedtobow.如你所愿夫人Asyouwish,ma'am.好的Herb我能为你做什么Okay,Herb,whatcanIdoyoufor?嗯你自己准备好吧我有坏消息Well,pleaseprepareyourselfIhaveterriblenews.是吗Youdo?世界明天早上就要终结rTheworldisgoingtoendtomorrowatdawn.啊不是吧你确定是明天吗Awnuts.Yousureit,stomorrow?恐怕是的就在日出之时Afraidso.Rightatdawn.整个地球Theentireplanet.消失我没收到提醒啊HerbGone.-Notgivingmemuchnotice,Herb.我来看看我能做什么吧-好的1.etmeseewhatIcando.-Okay.1970年代有一阵AForawhileinthe1970s,我们镇被一个古怪的邪教接管了ourtownwasrunbyafreakycult.每隔儿年残党们就会预测世界要终结Everyfewyears,theremainingmemberspredictedtheworld'sgonnaend.他们会在公园里彻夜守夜Andtheyhaveanall-nightvigilinthepark.超级烦人It'ssuperannoying.看来当你觉得世界要终结的时候Turnsoutwhenyouthinktheworld,sending,你就不会在移♥动♥厕所里小心瞄准了youdon'taimsocarefullyintheport-a-potties.公园与游憩公园与游憩第4季第6集第4季第6集今晚“理性派”的追随者们Tonight,thefollowersof"Reasonableism"要聚在一起等候Zorp的归来willbejoiningtogethertoawaitthereturnofZorp.这个巨型蜥蜴神会用审判的清净之火消灭地球ThegiantlizardgodwhowilldestroytheEarthwithhiscleansingfireofjudgement.还要提供小食Alsolightrefreshmentswillbeserved.哦去年他们吃的是披萨他们又要吃披萨了吗Oh,lastyeartheyhadpizza.Aretheygonnahavepizzaagain?嗯上面说他们有火鸡三明治Uhm.saysthey'vegotturkeysandwiches和千悲之醉andthenectarofathousandsorrows.哦那个很棒的其实是根汁汽水混红酒Oh,thatissogood!It,srootbeerandredwine.我去开过一次会Iwenttoonemeeting.等等Wait!我会想念你的巨型椅子Gonnamissyou,enormouschair.你真在上面坐过啊-是的我爱它Youreallysatonthisthing?-Yes!Ilovedit.感觉像是个小国王Feltlikeatinyking.T田我们做到了宝贝T-cups!Wedidit,baby.我们从头搭建了一家公♥司♥Webuiltacompanyfromthegroundup.然后我们又把头埋回去了Andtheweranitbackintotheground.要记住的重要事情.就是这是一场巨大的成功Theimportantthingtoremember.isthatitwasamassivesuccess.来杯RemyMartinRemyMartin?嗯娱乐7二C）已经死掉了它去公♥司♥天堂了Well,Entertainment720isdead.It'supincompanyheaven.三家公♥司♥均已倒闭和大♥片♥在线和Askjeeves一样A,BlockbusterandAskjeeves.AskJeeves的形式是一个有问必答的管家形象我的公♥司♥没比请个假管家来帮你Google搜索的公♥司♥好多少MycompanyisnobetterthanacompanywhereyouaskafakebutlertoGooglethingsforyou.有人吗Hello!所以看起来我们一个人还剩下5000块到手Soitlookslikewe'lleachendupwithabout$5,000apiece.停下Stop.我们一个人有五K吗那太棒了Wegetfiveg,seach?That,samazing!你起步资金可是45万啊Youstartedoutwith450,000.记得D）钝给我们定制入场节拍吗RememberwhenD）Bluntzmadeusourownpersonalentrancebeat?记得开业之夜聚会你和接待员Tess跳舞太用力RemembertheopeningnightpartywhenyoudancedsohardwithTessthereceptionist断了一根肋骨吗andyoubrokeoneofyourribs?它一直都没完全愈合Itneverhealedproperly.每一次呼吸都是挣扎,Everybreathisagony.停下Stop.所以下一步是什么TOmmyDavidsonSowhat'snext,TommyDavidson?我觉得我们把这一万拿去投资然后我“意外”被-辆公交车撞倒IsayWeinvestourtenlargeandthenI"accidentally"getrunoverbyacitybus.然后我们开始我们的嘻哈厂牌andwestartourownhip-hoplabel.听着我们可以打安全牌1.isten,wecouldplayitsafe.但e720不是这样的Butthat'snotwhate720isallabout.不不是No,itisnot.我们这个地儿还有一晚上对吧Wehavethisplaceforonemorenight,right?我们明天中午就要走人了We'reouttietomorrowatnoon.不然我们用上剩下的每一分钱Whatifwetookeverydimewehadleft,办一个最后的大聚会threwonelastparty.让它包含我们想象中公♥司♥样子的精华Madeittheessenceofeverythingwewantedthecompanytobe.聚会主题Aparty.就是世界末日Fortheendoftheworld.嘘你在"剩下的每一分钱”就让我入伙了Shh!Youhadmeat"everydimewehaveleft."因为我就像律师本色里的LaraFlynnBoyle一样BecauseminlikeLaraFlynnBoyle.from"ThePractice."好好好好好好好型男Dillydillydillydillydillydillydillyswag!为什么这个邪教自称“理性派”Whydoesthecultcallthemselves"TheReasonableistsn?嗯他们觉得如果人们批评他们Well,theyfigureifpeoplecriticizethem看起来就像在攻击很理性的东西it'llseemlikethey'reattackingsomethingveryreasonable.奇怪的机智啊That'sweirdlybrilliant.你看没有什么要担心的1.ook,there'snothingtoworryabout.他们预测世界末日已经15次了They'vesaidthattheworldisgoingtoend15times.那些日期里发生的唯一一件坏事就是Andtheonlybadthingthat,severhappenedonanyofthosedatesis著名自行车运动员1.anceArmstrong里了歌♥手SherylCrow1.anceArmstrongdumpingSherylCrow.那是悲惨的一天-。恩Thatwasatragicday.-Hmm.1.ivestrong是LanceArmstrong创办援助癌症患者的基金会活得坚强点1.ivestrong.不管怎样我觉得Ben和我今晚应该陪着你Inanyrate,IthinkBenandIshouldaccompanyyoutonight.哦我不觉得我们必须这么做Oh,Idon'tthinkwehavetodothat.不不不我坚持这公做No,no,no,1insist.这些人活在榆木脑星球Thesepeopleliveonplanetnutbrain.我住在巴旦木脑星球Iliveonplanetnutbran.巴旦木对你的结肠很有帮助呢Branandnutsareveryhelpfulforyourcolon!啊看起来我们要被强迫相处了Well,itlookslikewe'rekindofforcedtohangoutwitheachother.是啊听着我-我会来转一会儿Yeah,listen,ll-11comeforabit,但如果你可以的话我不会一直呆着的butifit,sokaywithyou,I'mnotgoingtostay.就是你知道有点奇怪对吧It,sjust,youknow,stillkindofweird,right?是是对对对对Yeah,yeah.Yeah,yeah,yeah,yeah.对对对嗯哼完全理解Yeah,yeah,yeah,mm-hmm,totallygetit.绝对理解Definitelygetit.Ben和我最近没怎么相处了BenandIdon'thangoutmuchthesedays.多大事一大堆人不相处啊Bigdeal,lotsofpeopledon'thangout.Jerry和April奥巴马和麦当娜可能吧JerryandApril.ObamaandMadonna,probably.我们已经有陪伴了We'reingoodcompany.我们今晚要做啥啊Whatshouldwedotonight?我不知道我觉得我们就点披萨吧Idon'tknow,Ijustfigurewe,lljustordersomepizza.你看我玩XBoxYouwatchmeplayXBox,然后我看你打恶作剧骚扰电♥话♥andthenIcouldwatchyoumakesomeprankphonecalls?我们喝醉亲热Wegethammered?Makeout?我们每晚都这么做啊Wedothateverynight.那是因为重复是良好婚姻的关键That'sbecauserepetitionisthekeytoagoodmarriage.我们做点怪事吧1.et'sdosomethingweird.来嘛可能是世界最后一晚呢Comeon,itcouldbethelastnightonearth.我们可以做我遗愿清单上的是Wecoulddosomethingoffmybucketlist.你还有遗愿清单呢Youhaveabucketlist?在超级碗赛点触底得分Catchthewinningtouchdownatthesuperbowl.做世上最好吃的烤芝士三明治Makethemostamazinggrilled-cheesesandwichever.中彩票骑独轮车Winthelottery.Rideaunicycle.发明个啥Inventsomething.在飞机上坐头等舱Flyfirstclassonaplane.还有人们走过的时候Andwhenpeoplearewalkingby,摆出这样的表情belikethis:跳伞跑得比河马快Goskydiving.Outrunahippo.我想和奥尼尔翻拍精灵也疯狂dliketoremakethemovieKazaamwithShaquilleO'Neal然后他演精灵我想把它拍对了whereheplaysagenieanddliketogetitright.教我的儿子Teachmyson扔出一个完美旋球tothrowtheperfectspiral.生个儿子Haveason.好吧嗯这是我们今晚要做的Allright,well,thisiswhatwe'redoingtonight.等等哪一条Wait,whichone?我们改掉我的手♥机♥套餐Wecanchangemycellphoneplan.那会很好玩-不Thatwouldbefun.-No.这一条Thisone.8009001000800,900,1,000.账户余额里还剩多少Andhowmuchisleftinthebankaccount?18块0418dollarsandfourcents.哇还有好多剩下的呢Whoa!Stillalotleftover.好的你想手里拿着一千现金吗Okay,youwantedtohold$1,000cashinyourhands?这超级让人失望啊That'ssuperdisappointing.9989991000998,999,1000.耶Yes!这才是我想象中的感觉啊NowthisiswhatIimagined!你这辈子见过这么多现金吗Haveyoueverseenthismuchcashinyourentirelife?我刚刚给你啊Ijusthandedittoyou.硬币Nickels!我想换成硬币Iwantnickels.一亿个硬币-别AndyAbillionnickels!-No,Andy.嘿HerbHey,Herb?怎么-抱歉打扰你-嗯没事Yeah?-Sorrytobotheryou.-Yeah,sure.1.eslie说你还需要付许可费是$281.esliesaysyoustillneedtopayforthepermit,it,s$28.哦抱歉Oh,msorry.这是支票Here,sthecheck.你可以明天兑现Youcancashthattomorrow.晚上好先生们女士们Evening,gentlemen,ladies.嘿Ron-Zorp万岁Hey,Ron!-HailZorp.你好吗Howareyou?我很棒.mgreat.这是个美丽的世界末日前夜Itisabeautifulnightfortheendoftheworld.祝贺你们所有人都到达了终点线Congratulationstoallofyouforreachingthefinishline.Zorp人们很可笑TheZorpiesareridiculous.但就像开国元勋们一样But,likethefoundingfathers,我相信完全自&hearts油♥的宗教信仰Ibelieveinabsolutefreedomofreligion.而且他们的仪式需要演奏长笛Alsotheirceremoniesrequiretheplayingofflutes.我正好在木工车间里做长笛Ihappentomakeflutesinmywoodshop.长笛80块一根Flutesare$80apiece.录音机是150Andrecordersare150.嘿它们太美了Hey,they'rebeautiful.你接受支票吧Wouldyoutakeacheck?当然Sure.欢迎来到E720的WelcometoE720,s世界末日庆典endoftheworldcelebration.整个聚会都是VIP区域Theentireparty'saVIParea.还有个双重VIP区域There'salsoadoubleVIParea.三重VlP区域AtripleVIParea.还有百夫长精英VIP区域AndtheCenturionClubeliteVIParea.由SobeLifewater赞助SponsoredbySobeLifewater.没人能进那里连我们都不行-嗯呢Noone'sallowedinthere,notevenus.-Uh-uh.我们有不是一个而是六个开放式酒吧Wehavenotone,butsixopenbars.最好的是蛇汁冰喷泉Andbestofall,SnakeJuiceicefountain.凉一个TChillit,T!汁好凉爽Juiceissochilled!骰子Craps!转盘Roulette!嗷海盗Ahrrrmatey!海盗船充气城♥堡♥带泡泡Pirateshipbouncycastlewithbubbles.虾墙Shrimpwall.特别贵宾分虾人印第安纳步行者队中锋RoyHibbertAndspecialVIPshrimpdistributorIndianaPacers'CenterRoyHibbert.这就是你想让我做的吗Isallyouwantmetodo?给聚会上的人分虾Passoutshrimptopeopleattheparty?是的别再问问题了Yes,andstopaskingquestions!有个头吗可能你想要来个免费软呢帽Gotahead?MaybeyouwantafreeFedora.想亲热吗去我们的亲热房♥间Wannamakeout?Gotooutmakeoutroom.临走之前别忘了拿个礼物袋Andbeforeyouleave,don'tforgetthegiftbag.Jean-Ralphio宾客名单上有动物吗Jean-RaIphio,thereareanimalsontheguestlisttonight?让我看看TT哦只有一个1.etmecheck,T.T.Oh,justone.是孟加拉虎BengalTiger!我们还雇了十个吓人的彪形大汉当保镖戴着耳机Wealsohiredtenhuge,scarybouncerswithearpieces.Keith怎么啦-嗯Whatup,Keith?-Mmm.三年前他其实把我从一家俱乐部里扔出去过Heactuallyoncetossedmeoutofaclubthreeyearsago.三十年河西Waterunderthebridge.DJ钝混出了些新节奏DJBluntzismixingupsomenewbeats.只有200人允许进入保证排外性Only200peoplewillbeadmittedtoretainexclusivity.浪子们浪♥女&hearts们安全带系好了Ballersandballerettes,fastenyourseatbelts.完美的聚会现在Theperfectpartybegins.干杯开始Clink!Now.感谢上帝ThankGod.没人会准时参加一场好聚会Nooneshowsuptoagoodpartyontime.如果现在真的有人出现的话Ifanybodyactuallyshoweduprightnow,整个聚会都会被毁掉的thewholepartywouldhavebeenruined.会是一场灾难的Itwouldhavebeenadisaster.我才不想去那场聚会1don'twanttogotothatparty.市政♥府♥把他们看待为安全威胁吗Doesthecityconsiderthemathreattopublicsafety?哦完全不是ShaunaMalwae-TweepOh,notatall,ShaunaMalwae-Tweep.上一次“理性派”发生的意外事件已经超过30年了It'sbeenover30years,sincethere'sanyincidentinvolvingtheReasonableists.所以我不该过度分♥析♥SoIshouldn'tinterpretanythingfromthefact市政经理办公室的两个人现在都在场吗thattherearetwopeoplefromthecitymanager'sofficehere?嗯除了我没有其他事情做之外Well,nothingexceptthatIhadnothingbettertodo.实际上更说明我的而不是他们的问题Whichprobablysaysmoreaboutmethanthem.谢谢-头条建议Thanks.-Headlineidea.”是他们认知中的世界末日"It'stheendoftheworldastheyknowit,但Pawnee感觉没事"butPawneefeelsfine."有点长了-好吧”什么ZOrPIt'salittlelong.-Okay,"ZorpShmorp!”末Fl预测未达预期"Doomsdaypredictionfallsflat"而市,民们在Pawnee最好公园之一度过愉快夜晚""ascitizensspendpleasanteveningenjoyingoneofPawnee'sfinestparks."居然更长了Somehowlonger.好吧那我们就还是用前一个Right,okaylet'sgowiththefirstone.好的嗯嘿还有.Great,um,hey,also.他挺帅的啊他单身吗你知道吗He,scute.Ishesingle,doyouknow?Chris吗不Chris?No.他在和Jerry的女儿约会He'sactuallydatingJerry'sdaughter.哦不抱歉我说的是Ben他有啥故事啊Oh,nosorry,ImeantBen.What'shisstory?谁-BenWho?-Ben?我-我不知道I-Idon'tknow.我-我不确-我不确定I-mnots-mnotsure.他嗯是个男的是个职员He's,um,amanandhe'saworker.而且他-呃我们没讨论过性所以Andheis-uh,we,veneverdiscussedsex,so.是-我们总是很专业样子所以.It'swe'vealwaysjustbeenverybusinesslike,so.你猜得很对-非也比我的更好Yourguessisasgood-nay,betterthanmine.剧终作者LeslieKnopeTheend.ByLeslieKnope.好吧行谢谢Okay.Cool,thanks.很-很开心能帮忙H-happytohelp.发生什么了What'shappening?世界末日来了Theworldisending.哦天我知道这会怎么样Ohboy,Iknowhowthisgoes.我知道Shauna的方式IknowhowShaunaoperates.她笑了然后他俩相爱Shesmiles,andthentheyfallinlove,然后他们结婚andthentheygetmarried,然后她把名字改成ShaunaMalwae-WyattandthenshechangeshernametoShaunaMalwae-Wyatt.或者他真的很开明Orhe'sgoingtobereallyprogressive把自己的名字改成BenWyatt-Malwae-TweepandchangehisnametoBenWyatt-MaIwae-Tweep.天他假设里能这么做我真的很生气GOd,Iamsoannoyedthathewouldhypotheticallydothat.好吧.Leslie他们只是在聊天Okay.Leslie,they'rejusttalking.你说什么"只是聊天“他在笑啊Whatdoyoumean"justtalking"?He,ssmiling.而且她看起来很迷人的Andsheseemsverycharming.她比我更迷人吗Isshemorecharmingthanme?Ann如果你回答“是“我会踢你的我对天发誓Ann,ifyousay"yes,',Iwillkickyou.IsweartoGod.你当然更迷人You'redefinitelymorecharming.但我在这里要提醒你Butmheretoremindyou你不能和他约会thatthereasonyou'renotdatinghim是因为你决定竞选市议会isbecauseyoudecidedtorunforcitycouncil.哦所以就因为我不能和他约会Oh,sojustbecauseIcan,tgooutwithhim,其他人就可以吗someoneelsecan?哦唉Oh,boy.哇好嘛Wow.-Okay.我很确定这不算事msurethisisnothing.好吧嗯那肯定是有事了Okay,well,thatwasdefinitelysomething.我的天我知道这一招Oh.MyGod.-1knowthatmove.他们五分钟之后就要做♥爱♥了They'regonnahavesexinfiveminutes.我得阻止他们vegottastopthis.我得让他们彼此余生都保持距离I'vegottakeepthemawayfromeachotherfortherestoftheirlives.你要怎么做到-我不清楚Howareyougonnadothat?-Unclear!哦棒十块钱Oh,yeah,tenbucks!这算上中彩票了Thatcountsaswinningthelottery.好现在这是世上最好吃的烤芝士三明治吗Okay,nowisthisthemostamazinggrilled-cheesesandwichevermade?嗯挺棒的Mmm,it'sprettyawesome.亲爰的我的遗愿清单上没说Honey,mybucketlistdoesn'tsay“做一个挺棒的烤芝士三明治”"makeaprettyawesomegrilled-cheesesandwich.'1得回商店去Gottagobacktothestore.我们要试另一种芝士We'regonnagetadifferentkindofcheese.不不不伙计认真的No,no,no,dude,seriously.这就是世上最好吃的烤芝士三明治好吧Thisisthemostamazinggrilled-cheesesandwichevermade,okay?好下一条是啥Okay.What'snext?嘿你在这呢哇你俩还在聊呢Hey,thereyouare.Wow,youtwoarestilltalking?Ben还没让你无聊到死啊Benhasn'tboredyoutodeathbynow.怎久说话呢-太无聊了Hey.-Soboring.实际h我们聊得挺开心的Actually,wewerehavingareallygreattalk.把你裤子穿好-啥Keepyourpantson.-What?我是说你裤子穿得真好啊妹子Imean,keepyourpantson,girl!我是说这些裤子可真是好啊Imean,thosearereallynicepants.我真的喜欢你的裤子你在哪买♥♥的啊Ireallylikeyourpants.Where,dyougetthem?你想再去买♥♥裤子吗Doyouwanttogobuysomemorepants?或者嗯从这走开Or,Um,walkawayfromhere?实际上我觉得我的素材已经积累够rActually.IthinkIhaveeverythingIneededhere,但我可能会去那个世界末日聚会butImightheadovertothatendoftheworldparty.哦那是所有废物们会去的地方呢Oh,that'swhereallthelosersaregoing.是啊那是什么啊Tom给我发邮件了Yeah,whatisthat?Tomemailedme.我可以去看看-呃Icouldcheckthatout-Hurrrrr.嗯那你应该呆在这里Well,thenyoushouldstayherethen.因为你不能走Becauseyoucan'tgo.我说如果Zorp出现的时候你不在这里呢Imean,whatifyou'renotherewhenZorpshowsup?哎呀你的脸肯定会红的Boy,wouldyourfacebered.ZorP出现的时候WhenZorpshowsup,你的脸会融化被当作燃料yourfaceswillbemeltedoffandusedasfuel.你想为r这个呆在这啊Youwanttobehereforthat.我觉得我还是赌一把吧Ithinklltakemychances.1.eslie和往常一样多谢1.eslie,thanksasalways.哇真是让人难以置信地不舒服的人啊Wow.Whatanunbelievablyunpleasantperson.Melissa进去享受一下吧-好的Melissa,getintherewithyourbadself.-Allright.准备好了吗-准备好了Youready?-mready.能抓到的都能留下Anythingyougrabisyourstokeep.来吧Hitit!是的Yes!完美的聚会这是个难以捉摸的点子Theperfectparty.It'sanelusiveidea.人们需要从进来那一刻到出门那一刻之间完全参与娱乐Peoplehavetobecompletelyentertainedfromthemomenttheywalkin,tothemomenttheyleave.这是个伟大的实验It'sagrandexperiment.而我是个聚会科学家AndI.amapartyscientist.欢迎来到我的实验室Welcometomylaboratory.所以“理性派”最初占领镇了的时候你就住在这了吗Soyouwerelivingherewhen"Reasoneableism"firstsweptin?是的LouProzotovich他们的创办人Iwas.LouProzotovich,theirfounder,是一个办公器材销♥竹♥wasanofficesuppliessalesman.有一天他有了个有趣的点子Oneday,hehadaninterestingidea.可能他可以写一本书帮助人们整理办公室Maybehecanwriteabooktohelppeopleorganizetheiroffices.“整理吧”"Organizeit!"这本书获得了巨大的成功Thebookwasabigsuccess.然后Lou有了另一个有趣的点子ThenLouhadanotherinterestingthought.可能有个长着火山嘴巴的八米半的大蜥蜴Maybethereisa28-foottalllizardwithavolcanoforamouth在控制着宇宙-那挺有意思whocontrolstheuniverse.-Thatisinteresting.所以他写了第二本书Sohewroteasecondbook.”整理吧2:与Zorp连接”"Organizeit2:EngagewithZorp"你知道我能看看吗Youknow.couldIhavealookatthat?当然可以ChrisWellsureyoucan,Chris.留着都行Youcankeepit.我要是你就跳过前几章了dskipthefirstcoupleOfchaptersifIwereyou,私下讲直到Zorp出现才.真正开始精彩betweenyouandme,itdoesn,treallygetgoodtillZorpshowsup.Zorp就是那个蜥蜴Zorpisthelizard.我信什么教WhatreligionamI?嗯我信的是不关你该死的事Well,mapracticingnoneofyourgoddamnbusiness.好