ParksandRecreation《公园与游憩（2009）》第四季第五集完整中英文对照剧本.docx
嗯包装眼球呃吸血鬼牙Hmm.Eyeballswrapped,uhm.vampireteeth哈吸血鬼牙Boom!Vampireteeth.好蜘蛛网Good.Spiderwebs.搞定嗯哼Done.-Mm-hm.假血胶囊Fakebloodcapsules.哦他们没货了Oh,theydidn'thaveany.真的吗Really?好恶心我喜欢That'sgross,Iloveit.我们要在家里开一场万圣节聚会WearethrowingaHalloweenpartyatourhouse.会是史上最棒的事情It'sgonnabethegreatestthingever.有人会死Someonewilldie.于快乐Offun!也死于谋杀Andofmurder.到时会有啤酒南瓜Andthere'sgonnabebeer,pumpkins.血腥哥布林Bloodygoblins.假的会很棒的Fakeones.It'sgonnabeawesome.我们有装饰Wehavedecorations.刚刚谋杀的死人Deadpeoplethatwejustmurdered.不是谋杀Not.murdered.但是是电视电影里的死人角色ButpicturesofdeadpeoplefromTVormovies.肢解的尸体Mutilatedbodies.但但是是假的B-butfakeones.糖果跳舞龙舌兰Candy,dancing,Tequila.各种食物和零食Allkindsoffoodandsnacks.血孤儿Bloodorphans.没有血孤儿Nobloodorphans.我.我不知道那是个啥I.Idon'tknowwhatthatis.公园与游憩公园与游憩第4季第5集第4季第5集我希望你维持主题这个主题就是Iwantyouonmessage,andthemessageis.1.eslieKnope1.eslieKnope.如果你不是在聊自己那你就聊错东西了Ifyou'renottalkingaboutyou,you'retalkingaboutthewrongthing.我讨厌聊自己Ihatetalkingaboutmyself克服一下我一直都在聊自己呢Getoverit.Italkaboutmyselfconstantly.所有人都因为这爱我Everyonelovesmeforit.我真的很棒Ireallyamamazing.当你在政♥府&hearts江作时人们经常怀疑你会反企业Whenyouworkingovernment,peopleoftensuspectthatyou'reanti-business.所以我开了一场小型见面会Somthrowingalittlemeet-and-greet邀请一些企业主们而我请Tom的公♥司♥来帮忙withbusinessowners,andveaskedTom'scompanytohelp.这是我的开场白Here,smyopeningline.“嗨我是LeSlieKnope我在做市议员的生意”"Hi.mLeslieKnope,andminthebusinessofbeingcitycouncilor."我的天哪我不会用这句的Oh,myGod.-mnotgoingtousethat.这是你的首要目标Thisisyourprimarytarget.商会主席MartinKernstonPresidentofthechamberofcommerce,MartinKernston.哦是的Kernston橡胶乳♥头♥的Oh,yes,fromKernstonRubberNipples."乳♥头♥王""Thenippleking."照片传记喜欢的不喜欢的医院处方Photos,bios,likes,dislikes,prescriptionmedications.我听说过MartinKernstonI'veheardofMartinKernston.我对他还是有点了解的-哦是吗Iknowalittlebitabouthim.-Oh,really?嗯他更信任哪个顾问呢Well,whichofhisadvisorsdoeshetrustmore,TedFlirtman还是RexSpaxTedFlirtmanorRexSpax?嗯看情况吧Flirtman更像是知己一Well,itdepends,FlirtmanismoreofaConfidant-两个名字都是我编的Imadeupboththosenames.好吧我看Okay,monit.说话Getatme.Jean-Ralphio别哭了Jean-Ralphio,stopcrying.什么What?等等慢点等等-Holdon,slowdown.Holdon-板栗过敏Allergictochestnuts.还有.好发型And.goodhaircuts.太紧松点It,stootight,looser.不啊我觉得我们该再充点气No,Ifeellikeweneedtoinflateitmore.不我告诉过你了我是个相扑运动员No,Itoldyou,masumowrestler减肥之后的样子afterhelosttheweight.我理解的是我们要开聚会了Itakeitwe'rehavingaparty.哥们Dude!我知道有我忘了告诉你的事情对不起咯IknewtherewassomethingIforgottotellyou.Sorry.不不不没事No,no,no,it'sfine.你们要开大聚会为啥需要告诉我呢Whyshouldyouguystellmeyou'regonnahaveanenormousparty?我我也没告诉你们我要在房♥间里安静地办公呢I-Ididn,ttellyouIwasgonnabequietlyworkinginmyroom.说得在点-是是是That'sagoodpoint.-Yeah,yeah,yeah.我猜我们打平了Iguesswe,reeven.如果你们需要我我-我肯定会醒着的Ifyouneedme,11-11definitelybeawake.因为我-我不可能睡着的BecauseI-Iwon't.beabletosleep.因为那个聚会Becauseoftheparty.你们知道吗Youknow?所以好了So.Allright.我的家庭是非常反冲突的Myfamilyisverynon-confrontational.我父母解决问题的方式Myparents'methodofproblem-solving基本上是把所有事情憋肚子里istokindofkeepeverythingbottledup然后微妙地暗示哪些事很烦andjustsubtlyhintatwhat'sbotheringthem.所以36年之后他们还是离婚状态Andafter36years,theyarestilldivorced.1.eslieKnope竞选市议会娱乐7二O为您呈:现LeslieKnope竞选市议会哇哇哇Whoa,WhOa,whoa.Tom我想象中的可不是这个样子啊Tom,thisisnotwhatIpicturedatall.这看起来像是给娱乐7二C）开的一场聚会ThislookslikeapartyforEntertainment720.是娱乐7二。在参选吗IsEntertainment720runningforoffice?是小企业啊It,sasmallbusiness.你在向人们展示你和小企业的关系很好You'retryingtoshowpeopleyouhaveagoodrelationshipwithsmallbusinesses.现在这个聚会都是关于你的宝Nowtheparty,that'sallaboutyou,Boo.好吧那我的脸不是应该印在这些毯子上吗Okay,thenshouldn'tmyfacebeontheserugs?抱歉不是的msorry,no.我一直以来的梦想就是出现在毯子上It'salwaysbeenadreamofminetobearug.而现在终于发生了Andit'sfinallyhappened.Tom现在不是你探索你诡异梦想的时候Tom,nowisnotatimeforyoutoexploreyourweirddreams.好吗我希望这些全部消失所有东西Okay?Iwantallofthisgone,allofit.除了那个蛋线那个蛋糕留下Exceptthatcake.Keepthatcakehere.”梦想成成真的地方”把字涂掉就行Justscrapeoffthewords.DonnaDonna?蓝衬衫.Blueshirt.徽章Badge.警棍Nightstick.你是个女警You.areapolicewoman.是的Yup.你是个-福尔摩斯You'rearegular-SherlockHolmes.我在你之前解开了这个谜题Isolvedthatmysterybeforeyoudid.好吧这挺好玩的Okay,thiswasfun.AndyAndy!你是UFC传奇ChuckLiddellYouareUFClegendChuckLiddell.对哦That'sright.午夜凶铃里的女孩子GirlfromTheRing.对我来说夏洛克福尔摩斯真的是Tome,SherlockHolmesisliterally西方作品里最伟大的角色thegreatestcharacterintheWesterncanon.聪慧直觉帅气Smart,intuitive,handsome.将他英式的脆弱身躯换成超人类的体格你就得到了ReplacehispastyBritishfrailtywithsuperhumanphysicalfitness,andyouget.SherlockTraegerSherlockTraeger.玩具总动员角色蛋头先生MisterPotatohead.对头That'sright.嘿我亲爱的女儿今晚在哪呢Hey,where,smylovelydaughtertonight?她在家She'sathome.我知道你会来Iknewthatyouwouldbehere.我担心你可能会很关切AndIwasworriedthatyoumightbeconcerned,看到我俩晚上一起seeingustogetheratnight.你是个考虑周全的人You'reaverythoughtfulguy.但真的我对你俩约会没有问题Butreally,Ihavenoproblemwiththetwoofyoudating.真真的我是说看看你啊R-really,Imean,lookatyou.你就是你知道很美丽rYou'rejust,youknow,beautiful.你也很美丽You'rebeautiful.在内部你的精神居住的地方Ontheinsidewhereyourspiritlives.听着告诉她来聚会吧我根本不介意1.isten,tellhercometothepartyandIdon'tmindatall.哦好我给她发短♥信♥Oh,good,lltexther.好吧你能不看手♥机♥就发短♥信♥吗Okay,youcantextwithoutlookingatyourphone?我觉得不保持眼神交流Ithinkit'srudenottomaintaineyecontact对正在聊天的对象是不礼貌的withpeoplethatmtalkingto.那是我发的That'sfromme.哇Wow!你好Jerry;)我-这-这也太厉害了Ith-that,samazing.击掌哇Highfive.-Wow.嘿ROn你能来太好了Hey,Ron.Goodtoseeyou.你去年不也是海盗吗Weren'tyouapiratelastyear?是的这是我的万圣节服装啊Yes.ThisismyHalloweencostume.Andrew你意识到卫生间的水龙头在漏水吗Andrew,areyouawarethatyourbathroomfaucetisleaking?开玩笑呢吧Areyoukiddingme?我昨天才塞了只袜子进去啊Ijuststuffedasockinityesterday.他们还想让我怎么做啊Whatelsedotheywantmetodo?浴缸上方还有一根暴露的电线There'sanexposedwireabovethebathtubaswell.哦对电击线Oh,yeah,shockwire!我这么叫是因为你洗澡的时候碰到那根线Icallitthat'causeifyoutakeashowerandyoutouchthewire.你就死定了Youdie!是的非常准确Yes,thatisaccurate.你有工具箱吗Doyouhaveatoolbox?有啊Yeah.没有合适工具箱的家是不完整的Nohomeiscompletewithoutapropertoolbox.这是April和Andy的Here,sAprilandAndy's.一把锤子Ahammer.半个椒盐卷饼Halfofapretzel.棒球卡Baseballcard.SonictheHedgehog刺猬索尼克一个卡带上面写着“音速“和“刺猬”Somecartridgethatsays',Sonic"and"Hedgehog."一个剪子半Ascissorhalf.一把手电筒Andaflashlight.装满了糖豆Filledwithjellybeans.虽然我没有在专业上和你们合作Althoughvenotworkedwithyouprofessionally,作为私人公民我个人光顾过asaprivatecitizen,Ihavepersonallypatronized你们每一家机构eachandeveryoneofyourestablishments.嗯我从没见你在Sue,s买♥♥过沙拉啊Mm,veneverseenyoubuyasaladatSue'sSalads.那是因为我不讨厌自己TanyaThat's,causeIdon'thatemyself,Tanya.我很抱歉msorry.我知道我应该争取你的选票IknowIshouldbechasingyourvote,但我仍然坚持避免沙拉和其他恶心东西的决定butIstandbehindmydecisiontoavoidsaladandotherdisgustingthings.我觉得我为此在社区里也能获得很多支持AndIthinkIhavealotofsupportinthecommunityforthat.虽然这一切看起来像是在给Tom的脸开趴体DespitethefactthatthisseemslikeapartyforTom'sface,呃但我觉得进展还不错uh,Ithinkit,sgoingprettywell.在Pawnee被怀疑的时候就抨击沙拉Whenindoubt,inPawnee,slamsalad.我要特别感谢您能到场主席先生mjustespeciallythankfulthatyoucouldcome,Mr.President.叫我Martin-MartinMartin.-Martin.你是丰收节的负责人对吧YouwereresponsiblefortheHarvestFestival,right?不是的嗯No.Yes.Well.那是团队努力的成果我几乎没做什么Itwasateameffort.Ibarelydidanything.我还拖他们的后腿呢Iheldthembackactually.他们没了我也能成功Theysucceededdespiteme.抱歉我为那个项目弹精竭虑msorry.Iworkedveryhardonthatevent.我只是.mjust.官员不习惯吹捧自己Bureaucratssaren'tusedtobraggingaboutthemselves.Tom过来聊聊我有多厉害Tom,comeoverhereandtalkabouthowgreatIam.*Martin*JMartinJTomHaverford这场大宴会是我组织的TomHaverford.Ithrewthisshindig.Tom告诉Martin我在丰收节有多努力Tom,tellMartinhowhardIworkedontheHarvestFestival.确实难以置信Itwasincredible.很多人说丰收节是娱乐7二。的启动时刻AlotofpeoplesaytheHarvestFestivaliswhatlaunchedEntertainment720.没人这么说过-是我刚刚说的Noonesaysthat.-1justsaidit我的公♥司♥娱乐7二C）可以给Kernston,s提供一个非常好的商业机会Mycompany,Entertainment720,hasanamazingbusinessopportunityforKernston's.介意我偷走你几秒钟吗MindifIstealyouawayforafewseconds?给你点“节”Giveyouthe'tails?什么“节"The'tails?细节Thedetails.大多数人可能会说“细"Mostpeoplewouldprobablysay,'thedeets."我说的是“节“Isay"the'tails."只是创新的一个例子而已Justoneexampleofinnovation.你看我也不想太经常用“瘪二”这个词1.ook,Idon'tliketothrowaroundtheword"butthead"toooften.娱乐7二O为您呈现LeslieKnope见面会如果你把所有人都叫瘪三那它就失去了冲击力Ifyoucalleverybodyabutthead,thenitkindoflosesitsimpact.但我可以毫不怀疑地说Tom是个混♥蛋♥ButIcansaywithouthesitationthatTomisbeingarealdick.嘿Hey!你偷走了乳♥头♥王啊Youstolethenippleking.太感谢r叛徒Thanksalot,traitor.抱歉我只需要问他一件事现在没事了msorry,Ijustneededtoaskhimaboutthisonething,butwe,reallgoodnow.要要不我介绍你上台演讲呢Wh-whatifIjustintroduceyouforyourspeech?我有个更好的主意Ihaveabetteridea.不然你去你的哪张地毯上坐在你自己的脸上呗Whydon'tyougoovertooneofyourrugsandsitonyourownface?我不需要你的“帮助”了Idon'tneedyour"help"anymore.你好Hithere.你想完成什么工程吗Isthereaprojectyou'reworkingon?我懂得比你多Iknowmorethanyou.好吧Allright.April和Andy结婚的时候我没给他们准备结婚礼物WhenAprilandAndymarried,Ididn'tgetthemaweddingpresent.我的个人经验里结婚礼物不过是离婚火焰的燃料罢了Inmyexperience,weddingpresentsarenothingmorethankindlingonadivorcebonfire.但我想我找到了帮他们整理房♥子的方式ButIthinkIfoundawayIcanreallyhelpthemmakeahome.你豆袋跟我来You,beanbag,comewithme.我是个茄子maneggplant我不在乎跟我来Idon'tcare.Comewithme.为啥-我需要助手Why?-1needsmallhands.我.“害怕m.scared.看看谁决定加入聚会了兄弟1.ookwhodecidedtojointheparty,bro!太棒了That'sawesome!你服装呢Where,syourcostume?亲爰的他已经打扮了啊Honey,he'swearingacostume.他打扮成衰人He,sgoingaslame.那其实是个挺好的打扮That'saprettygoodcostumeactually.但呃我觉得蝙蝠侠那套好太多了But,uh,IthinktheBatmancostume'swaybetter.你该去换上那套Youshouldgowearthat.是啊我觉得我还是不要换装了Yeah,Idon,tthinkmgonnaputonacostume因为我没有真的参加这个聚会becausemnotreallyattendingthisparty.在我住的地方That'satmyhouse.嘿听着如果你在生气的话Hey,listen,ifyou'remadaboutsomething,你就该-不我没youshouldjust-No,mnot我没生气mnotmad.真的吗听着我觉得你好像生气了Really?Listen,Ifeellikeyouaremad.所以可能你应该跟我们聊聊Somaybeyoushouldjusttalktousaboutit.我的名字是BenMyname,sBen.我生气了mmad.好吧那很棒Allright,thatwasgreat,谢谢谢谢你了-软软嘴唇Thankyou.Thanksforthat.-Soft,softlips.你的手指好咸Yourfingersaresalty.我要去完成工作-mgonnafinishmywork-Orin不不行别进来Orin,no!No.Stayout.Pawnee的经济不景气影响严重Pawneehassufferedthroughatougheconomy.而让这个镇活下来的是你们小企业主们Andwhathaskeptourtownaliveisyou,thesmallbusinessman.我不是在说你的身高GaryAndmnotreferringtoyourstature,Gary.你是这个社区的巨人Youareagiantinthiscommunity.太多企业今天到场了Somanybusinessrepresentedheretoday.食物和东西JJ餐厅FoodandStuff,JJ,sDiner,Glenmore折扣墓地GlenmoreDiscountCemetery,呃低腰纹身uh,TrampStampTattoos,巨大Kenny的油条摊和手♥机♥中心EnormousKenny'sFriedDoughStandandMobilePhoneEmporium.还有谁Sue's沙拉Whoelse?Sue'sSalads.精明圆滑比基尼脱毛SmoothOperatorBikiniWaxes.Jeff的储蓄贷款JeffsSavingsandLoan.还有娱乐7二OAndEntertainment720.感谢你的出色介绍LeslieThankyousomuchforthatamazingintro,Leslie.嗨老乡们Hi,folks.我叫TomHaverford我是来跟你们讲MynameisTomHaverford,andmheretotellyou一点点关于Pawnee初次亮相的娱乐和多媒体联合企业alittlebitaboutPawnee'spremiereentertainmentandmultimediaconglomerate,*娱乐7二O*JEntertainment720J*梦想成成真的地方*Jwheredreamscome,theycometrueJ来段简要的宣传片怎么样Howaboutwewatchthisbriefpromotionalfilm?什么What?娱乐7二C）从六月开始就是这个社区的固定成员了Entertainment720hasbeenafixtureofthiscommunitysinceJune.Tom听我说Tom,listentome.把它关掉要么把遥控器给我Turnthatofforgivemetheremoterightnow.我们能让它继续放吗Canweletitplayplease?MartinKernston在这是你运气好You'reluckythatMartinKernstonishere因为你马上需要新乳♥头♥了becauseyou'regonnaneedanothernipple.这样There.我觉得我搞定了IthinkIgotit.是你搞定了Yep,yougotit.你至少能跟我说下你在干嘛吗Canyouatleasttellmewhatyou'redoing?我也有房♥子mahomeowner.我也想真的学点东西Iwouldliketoactuallylearnsomething.行Yeah.我在把阀杆紧到阀芯上mtighteningthevalvestemintothevalveshank.换掉了把手mreplacingthehandle.然后拧紧定位螺丝Andthentighteningthesetscrew,它可以固定位置whichwillholditinplace.现在Now.哦天啊我们修好了Oh,myGod!Wemadeitwork.感觉不错lt,sagoodfeeling.一种成就感和自豪感Asenseofaccomplishmentandpride.该死我就是很爱这个DamniIjustloveitsomuch.你还好吗Areyouokay?很好Great.我要在房♥子里转,圈mgonnagoaroundthishouse把所有能修的东西都修了andfixeverythingIcanfindthatneedsfixing.想来帮忙吗Youwannahelp?我真的想Ireallydo.很好Good.那是下一个That'snext.我不能揭露我的身份因为有对手公&hearts同♥Ican'trevealmyidentitybecauseofvariouscorporateenemies,但知道这个就够了butsufficeittosay,我运行着一家相当流行的社交网站Irunafairlypopularsocialnetworkingsite.我们面对现实吧Andlet'sfaceit,预订e720是我做过最聪明的决定bookinge720wasthesmartestdecisionIevermade.我希望你会给这个故事点赞Ihopeyoulikedthisstory.我发明了FacebookIinventedFacebook.哇好吧嗯Wow.Okay,um.我知道这个视频看起来像一个疯子Iknowthatvideoseemedliketherantingsofalunatic假装自己是MarkZuckerberg-pretendingtobeMarkZuckerberg-那个是他啊-不That'swhothatwas?-No.也太厉害了Thatisimpressive.呃我们不会再浪费各位的时间了Uh,we,renotgonnawasteanymoreofyourtime.同意我们直入主题吧Agreed.Let'sgetrighttoit掌声欢迎e720的邮件列表女神们Pleasewelcomethee720mailinglistdivas!我想让你们所有人Iwantallofy'alltowritedownthename写下你们企业雇佣独♥立♥合同工anddirectphonelineforwhoever'sincharge负责人的专线号♥码ofhiringindependentcontractorsforyourbusiness!现在加入我一起在e720移♥动♥浴缸里泡一下吧NowcomejoinmeandIet,salltakeadipinthee720mobilehottub!它就停在门外It'sparkedrightoutside.走着1.e,go.嘿Ben-嘿Hey,Ben.-Hey.还以为你不参加聚会呢Thoughtyouweren'tcomingtotheparty.嗯我只是来吃个ButterfingerWell,mjusthavingabutterfinger.哦是么Oh,really?这样可以吗Isthatokay?不行No.你不是这个聚会的一部分你就不能吃糖You'renotpartoftheparty,youcan,thavethecandy.退后好了Backup.-Allright.退后-好吧Backup.-Okay.我有一个妹妹Ihaveonesister.我们偷彼此的东西Westealeachother'sStUff黑进彼此的TWitter账户hackeachother'sTwitteraccounts,点燃彼此的衣服seteachother,sclothesonfire.没有规则Therearenorules.我们需要处理你烦着的原因Weneedtodealwithwhat'sbotheringyou.哦拜托进我房♥间来Oh,please,comeintomyroom.你看你在生我的气而且你不说原因See?You'reangryatmeandyou'renottalkingaboutit我要打到你说为止因为我很成熟Andmgonnabeatyouupuntilyoudo,becausemmature.你在一Whatareyou住手Stopit.我和五个兄弟一起长大而且我们总是打Igrewupwithfivebrothersandwefought.用Dywer家的方式也就是尖叫UsingtheDwyermethod,whichwasyelling,摔跤wrestling,哭泣crying,然后是很多拥抱followedbylotsofhugs.然后是更多摔跤但是是好玩的那种Andthenmorewrestling,butthefunkind,然后是哭泣因为那种摔跤andthencryingwhenthefunkindofwrestling玩脱了gotoutofhand.嗯你能让我走了吗Um,canyouletmego?你不告诉我出啥事就不行Not,tilyoutellmewhat'swrong.呃主席先生Um,Mr.President.我只想为那个小黄鼠狼的行为道歉Ijustwanttoapologizefortheactionsofthatlittleweasel.1.eslie我是一个朴素的人1.eslie,mafrugalman.我不喜欢铺张或者作秀Idon'tlikeextravaganceorshowmanship.所以我给自己理发That'swhyIcutmyownhair.所以我才成为一个成功的商人Andit'swhat'smademeasuccessfulbusinessman.因此如果娱乐7二C）是你信任的那种企业SoifEntertainment720isthekindofbusinessyoutrust,恐怕你和我不具有同样的价值观mafraidyouandIdon'tsharethesamevalues.在这呢你个小混♥蛋♥Thereyouare,youlittlebastard.现在给我滚出来Getoutofthererightnow.1.eslie你能帮我个忙就让我坐在这儿吗1.eslie,canyoudomeafavorandjustletmesithere?Tom从你愚蠢的豪车浴缸里现在
