Desperate Housewives《绝望的主妇》第二季第十四集完整中英文对照剧本.docx

前情回顾Previouslyon.你的脾脏离心脏太近了Yourspleenhaswanderedclosetoyourheart.必须做手术Wegottatakeitout.把医疗保险的手续办好Getyourinsurancefiguredoutbythen,hmm?有坏的消息我要你去和个警♥察♥谈谈Therewasthebadnews.There'sacopIwantyoutotalkto.他叫所罗门这是他女儿的资料HisnameisSullivan.ThefileonNoah'sdaughter.有令人不安的消息Thediscomfortingnews.谢谢Thanks.你家里藏了谁？Areyouhidingsomeoneinyourhouse?告诉我你的秘密我能理解好吧Tellmeyoursecrets.llunderstand.Okay.还有不该透露的消息Andthenewsnooneshouldknow.但先告诉我你们的秘密Butyoutellmeyoursfirst.每月一次Onceamonth,俱乐部的女士们thecremedelacremeofFairviewsociety会参加马克新.博涅特家的午餐会wouldattendaSemiformalluncheonatthehomeofMaxineBennett.每个人都喜欢那优雅的聚会Everyonelovedtheseelegantget-togethers.每个人Everyone,thatis,卷个人除了那位红头发的女士butacertainredheadedhousewife她确信马克新在说谎whowasconvincedMaxinewasaliar.看马克新吹嘘Yousee,Maxinelikedtobrag所有饭菜都是自己做的thatshedidallherowncooking.由于每道菜都是如此及时Andbecauseeachcoursewasservedpromptly.色彩鲜艳Presentedwithflair.It,sdelicious.口感上佳Andwaspositivelymouthwatering,布里认定她有帮手BreeknewMaxinehadhadsomehelp.对马克新来说是坏消息Thankyousomuch.AndsadlyforMaxine,因为布里打算证明这点Breeintendedtoproveit.马克新这顿饭简直棒极了！Maxine,onceagain,thisentirelunchwasjustoutofthisworld.我想要你伙食承包人的电♥话♥Ijusthavetogetthenumberofyourcaterer.谢谢你的称赞Whatanicecompliment.但这些都是我自己做的No,mafraidthisisallmydoing.太棒了绝对成功Itwasatriumph,anabsolutetriumph.算了吧你不是真的要我们相信Oh,comeon.Doyouhonestlyexpectustobelieve你有时间为十个女人准备六道菜的大餐thatyouhadthetimetopreparea6-coursemealfor10women?就算是我都没有办法做到EvenIcouldn'tmakethisandhavetimetogetreadyforaparty.也许你不像我那么擅于组织Well,perhapsyou'rejustnotasorganizedasIam.抱歉失陪Ifyou'llexcuseme.布里你在想什么？Bree!What'sgottenintoyou?我有这道布丁的菜谱IhavethesamerecipeforEnglishplumpudding.这需要六小时准备Ittakessixhourstoprepare.怎么可能有时间Howwouldshehavetimetomakeallofthis再同时准备其它的菜？andeverythingelsethatweatetoday?这不像是诚实女人做的布丁Thisisnotthepuddingofanhonestwoman.FBI开门FBI!Openup!天啊什么事Whatonearth?我们找马克新班尼特We'relookingforaMaxineBennett.我就是我们要搜查这是搜杳令mMaxine.Wehaveawarranttosearchthepremises,ma'am.搜查?我们正在吃午餐Awarrant?minthemiddleofaluncheon.这里Overhere.找到了Foundher.什么What?!马克新.班尼特你被捕了MaxineBennett,you'reunderarrest罪名是非法奴役forinvoluntaryservitude.是她把你锁起来的？Isthisthewomanwholockedyouup?布里是怎么回事？Bree,what,sgoingon?我不肯定好像马克新有个奴隶Well,mnotsure,butIthinkMaxinehadaslave.不敢相信不敢相信Ican'tbelieveitIjustcan'tbelieveit.但布里可以相信ButBreecould.对她来说Yousee,forher,布丁就是证据theproofwasinthepudding.世界上充满了看似不可能的友情Theworldisfilledwithunlikelyfriendships,别人看来不般配的组合oddpairings,thattothecasualobserver,看似毫无意义makeabsolutelynosenseatall.但如果仔细观察Butifwelookcloser,我们就会发现这种组合的原因wecanseewhythesealliancesform.毕竟共同的目的Afterall,asharedpurpose可以让死对头成为盟友cangiveevenmortalenemiescommonground.布里我们有个问题Bree?Wehaveaquestionforyou.哦是什么？Oh!Whatisit?我们在想Well,wewerejustwondering.我们很好奇Actually,wewerecuriousabout,um.你和贝蒂艾波怀特是怎么回事？就是这个问题Whatthehell'sgoingonwithyouandBettyapplewhite?Yeah,that我不明白Excuseme?那具尸体出现的时候Well,fromthedaythatdeadbodyshowedup,你最先说艾波怀特家与此有关nobodywasyelling,"oh,theapplewhitesareinvolved!',然后你居然1.ouderthanyou.Andthenextthingweknow,请贝蒂参加牌局怎么回事？you'rehavingBettyoverforpoker.Whatgives?她说起来好像我们很生气其实没有我是有点生气Shemakesitsoundlikewe'reangry,andwe'renotangry.malittleangry.我们能晚点讨论吗?我手里拿着冰淇淋CanWetalkaboutthislater?I-Ihaveicecreaminhere.布里这种转变是不是Bree,couldthisflip-flophavesomethingtodowiththefact和丹妮尔约会马修有关系？thatDanielleisdatingMatthew?看来是这样Iknewthatwouldgether.谁跟你说的？Whotoldyouthat?麦克罗斯基夫人她在公园看到他们伊迪！Mrs.Mcclusky.Shesawthemmakingoutinthepark.Edie!什么？你不能说得委婉一点吗？What?Can'tyousugarcoatitalittle?已经委婉了Idid.他的手放在她衬衫里Hehadhishanddownhershirt.布里我们知道你有理由Bree,weknowthatyouhaveagoodreason让贝蒂参加我们forwantingBettytohangoutwithus.我们只希望你能透露一些消息Wejust.wonderedifyoucouldclueusinalittle.关于贝蒂.艾波怀特的事WhenitcomestoBettyapplewhite,我知道自己在做什么Iknowwhatmdoing,你们得相信我andyoutwoarejustgonnahavetotrustme.如果不Andifyoucan'tdothat,也许我要重新评价我们的友谊了thenperhapsveoverestimatedthedepthofourfriendship.恕我失陪Now,ifyou'llexcuseme.嫉♥子♥Whatabitch.伊迪你能不能.Edie,canyou.我已经委婉了Iwassugarcoatingit.嘿Hey.啊Oh!Hi.嘿别这样亲我Hey,noneofthatinhere.如果他们知道我和经理同居Comeon.Maybeifweremindedthatmshackingup他们就不会否定我的提案了withtheseniorv.P.,he'llstopkillingallmypitches.你才来一个礼拜You'veonlybeenhereaweek.为什么不慢慢来？亲爱的你知道艾德的作风Whydon'tyougiveyourselfabreak?Honey,youknowtheadgame.我必须在他嘲笑我把我踢到一边前抓紧时间I'veonlygotacertainamountoftimetomakemyMarkbeforehekicksmetothecurb.看我只是要你偶尔介人一下1.ook,mjustaskingyou.Jumpineveryonceinawhile,拉我一把当艾德有意见的时候我没法保护你throwmesomerope,youknow,whenEd'sonthewarpath.Ican'tprotectyou.你得自己想办法搞定艾德You'regonnahavetofindawaytoclickwithedyourself.然后那只猪摸着肚子发出这样的声音说Andthenthepig.herubshisstomachandhegoes.新鲜的农场熏肉?i上你欲罢不能"Farmfreshbaconwillmakeapiggyoutofyou,too."那么So.猪吃了熏肉？Thepigactuallyeatsthebacon?恩是啊我不觉得客户会喜欢Uh-huh,yeah.Idon'tseetheclientdoingahappydance同类互食的想法overthewholecannibalismtheme.汤姆你为什么不说一下昨天晚上的那个想法？Well,Tom,whydon'tyoupitchhimtheotheridea那个人们喜欢这种熏肉甚至不想告诉别人？youcameupwithlastnight?Youknow,theonewhere就像一个熏肉爱好者的秘密组织?peoplelovebaconsomuchtheywannakeepitasecret?就像我大学里的兄弟会What,likeasecretundergroundsocietyofbaconeaters?每个人都想加入Morelikemycollegefraternity,where,youknow,但我们只接纳最酷的人everybodywantedin,butweonlytookthecoolestguys.你是格里克会的？Wait,youwereGreek?我是阿尔法唐.曼古Yeah,Alphatauomega.我是费.旨普（兄弟会员的代号♥）你也是？Iwasphikapp.You?我可不觉得你能酷发誓A.T.0AndIdon'trememberyouhavingtobethatcooltopledgea.T.O.我有一枚硬币1.ook,ifIhadanickelforeveryphikapp是在高速公路上拼“裸体”留下的纪念品thatItiednakedtoafreewaysign.斯加沃如果我们在一起你肯定是我小弟你这么想吗？Scavo,ifyouweremypledge,dhavemadeyoumybitch.Oh,youthinkso?知道吗我喜欢兄弟会Youknowwhat?mlikingthiswholefraternityangle.我们午饭时再讨论Yeah.Youknowwhat?1.et'stalkaboutitoverlunch.你买♥♥单You'rebuying.去啊Go.谢谢你Thanksforyourhelp.出什么事了？Hello.What'sgoingon?加布丽尔我想要你见个人Gabrielle,Iwantyoutomeetsomeone.这是萧梅Thisisxiao-Mei.她被马克新.班尼特逼着干活哦那个奴隶She'stheyoungladywhowasforcedtoworkforMaxineBennett.Oh,theslave.哇看上去没被虐待Wow.1.ookswell-fed.教堂在办送她回国的手续ThechurchismakingarrangementsforhertoreturntoChina.在那以前她需要一个住处Butuntilthen,sheneedsaplacetostay.我把客房♥让她住SoIofferedupourguestroom.真的？Really?亲爰的能和你说句话吗？Baby,canItalktoyouforasecond?啊Ahem.你是白♥痴♥Areyounuts?!只住几天It,sonlyforacoupleofdays.Oh,thistime.这次你又变成罗利神父的慈善使者了Youarequicklybecomingfathercrowley'sgo-toguyforcharitycases.又不是坏事他把我们家Andthat'sabadthing?Whenheturnsourhouse变成天主教的庇护所!是坏事intoacatholicundergroundrailroad,yes!你知道自己是那种人吗加布？你就是那种Youknowwhoyouare,Gaby?You'rethekindofperson拒绝玛利亚和约瑟夫住旅店的人（圣经故事）whowould,veturnedawayMaryandJosephfromtheinn.他们应该先打电♥话♥预约Well,theyshould'vecalledahead.别在桌子上梳头发Don'tbrushyourhairatthetable.你在和我说话？Oh,you'retalkingtome?这表示你原谅我了？Doesthismeanyou'vefinallyforgivenme?我该原谅你？WhyshouldI?你出♥卖♥♥♥了你哥哥而你一点都不内疚Youbetrayedthisfamily,andyou,renotevensorry.别说得那么夸张Don'tbesuchadramaqueen.如果艾波怀特报♥警♥Iftheapplewhitesgotothepolice告诉他们你哥哥撞了索利斯夫人andtellthemthatyourbrotherranoverMrs.Solis,他可能会进监狱.hecouldgotoprison.你怎么就不明白？Howcanyounotunderstandthat?只要你不报♥警&hearts浩发卡博他们就不会告发安德鲁Theywon'ttalkaboutAndrewaslongasyoudon'tgotothepoliceaboutCaleb.卡博到底做了什么？WhatdidthisCalebdo,exactly?为什么要把他藏起来？Andwhyoneartharetheyhidinghim?为什么不去找艾波怀特夫人Whydon'tyougotoMrs.Applewhite告诉她你想知道真♥相♥?andtellheryoureallyneedtoknowwhat'sgoingon?如果你态度好我想她会告诉你的Ibetifyouwerereallynice,she'dtellyouthetruth.你真的那么想丹妮尔？Isthatwhatyoureallythink,Danielle?我该去找艾波怀特夫人？IshouldgotoMrs.Applewhite,benice,态度和蔼然后她就会告诉我所有秘密？andthenshe'llhandoverallhersecrets?是的Yeah.当我年青的时候我的继母告诉我我非常幸运WhenIwasyoung,mystepmothertoldmethatIwasverylucky.我有美貌智慧狡诈和洞察力Ipossessedbeauty,wit,cunningandinsight.这是每个女人在世界上生存所需要的武器Thesewereweaponsallwomenneededtosurviveintheworld.所以？So?所以好好看看自己的样子Sotakegoodcareofyourlooks,Danielle.你没有任何一样Youdon'thaveanyotherweaponsatyourdisposal.嗨我需要动手术Hi.Ineedanoperationonmyspleen,而我发现自己没有医疗保险了and1justfoundoutIdon'thavemedicalinsurance.我能起诉谁吗？IsthereanyoneIcansue?欺诈案之后罗尼自首了Aftertheembezzlement,Ionnyletthepolicylapse.他在监狱里而我就要死了Andnowhe'sinjail,andI'mgonnadie.苏姗你不会死的Susie,you,renotgonnadie.我会和保险公&hearts词♥交涉llgetintoitwiththeinsurancecompany.没有时间让你处理这个案子的No,thereisn'ttimeforyoutodealwiththeredtape.我的脾脏威胁到了心脏Myspleenisgoingcareeningintomyheart.现在就得动手术本来我可以借你钱Ineedthatoperationnow.Yeah,I'dloanyouthemoneymyselC但伊迪和我把积蓄都投资在了滑雪屋里butEdieandIjustploppeddownoursavingsinaskicondoand.我不要借钱我要保险Idon'tneedaloan.Ineedcoverage.如果有什么并发症Imean,whatiftherearecomplications?我没有安全保障Idon'thaveasafetynet.天啊Oh,mygod,please!你在做什么？Whatinthehellareyoudoing?我在祈祷msayingalittleprayer.真可笑Oh,forpuke,ssake.什么?我那么绝望你有什么主意吗？Well,what?mdesperatehere.Doyouhaveanyotherideas?实际上我有Asamatteroffact,Ido.你只需要一个丈夫Whatyouneedisahusband.什么？What?得到医疗保险最好的方法Theonlywaytogetagoodhealthplan就是嫁人istomarryintoone.省省吧伊迪Edie,comeon.不我觉得她有道理No,no,Ithinkshe'sontosomething.如果找到一个有保险计划的男人Yeah.Ifwefindaguywiththerightplan,你只需要在周一晚上假结婚youcouldhaveashamweddingonaMondaynight然后周二早上你就有医疗保险了andbefullycoveredTuesdaymorning.不敢相信你真的考虑这件事Ican'tbelieveyou'reactuallyconsideringthis.明天算起再过一周我就要被切开了Thesurgeonisslicingmeopenaweekfromtomorrow.还有什么选择？WhatotherchoicedoIhave?我要做的就是找个肯娶你的人Allwehavetodoisfindaguywho,swillingtomarryyou.仔细想一下Youknow,cometothinkofit,祈祷也许不是什么坏主意alittleprayermightnotbesuchabadideaafterall.帕德我们都在了Pat,we'reallhere,电♥话♥打来就接过来sosendthecallinassoonasyougetit.200块赌你不可能连续三次做到这个200buckssaysyoucan,tdothat3timesinarow.呃Huh?你接到三次Youcatchthreeofthose.200块归你200bucks.你怎么说斯加沃？Whatdoyousaythere,Scavo?成交You'reon.看我的啊啊啊Herewego.Ah-ah-ah-ah!我来丢Thrownbyme.抱歉我想我们是来msorry,Ithoughtwewerehere讨论农场鲜肉的首次展示totalkaboutthefarmfreshrollout?我能成功伙计投的事情让我来管Theygottabecatchable,bigguy.Youjustletmeworryabouttheshooting.来吧Comeon.第一个That'sone.伙计们Guys.哦Ohl接得好Nicemoves.再来一个伙计伙计们Onemore,bigguy.Guys,please.请不要.算了That's.allright.哦0w!哇Oh!哇0w.那是不可能接到的是不可能Thatwasn'tevencatchable!Yeah,WeI1.maybenot.但那值200块Butit'stotallyworththe200bucks.Ahh!哇Whoo!我服你了Well,yougotme.你真有意思You'rearegularlittlemonkeyman!我喜欢这个人0h,Ilovethisguy.哦嗨0h.Hi.干嘛整天坐着？Doyouhavetositaroundallday?为什么不体验一下西方文化Imean,shouldn,tyoubeoutexperiencingwesterncivilization趁你有机会？whileyouhavethechance?你在干什么？Whatareyoudoing?缝Ifix.不这是很贵的的衣服No,thisiscouture!只有很棒的裁缝才有本事缝Thisriphastobefixedbyanexperiencedtailor.你不能.Youcan'tjust.天啊缝得太好了Holycrap!Thisstitchingisperfect!饿了吗?Hungry?都是你做的？Didyoumakeallofthis?哦！Oh!给我的?好Forme?Okay.哦上帝啊Oh,mygod!喜欢？Youlike?很喜欢Ilikealot.喜欢吗？Youlikethat?很好吃Yeah,that'snice.你知道在中国他们DoyouknowwhattheydotopeopleinChina怎么对待对政♥府♥有意见的人吗？whospeakoutagainstthegovernment?Hmm?把他们送进劳♥改♥所Theyputtheminforcedlaborcamps.太可恶了Isn'tthatawful?恩Mm-hmm.知道我的意思吗?那是一个集权的政♥府♥YouknowwhatImean?It'ssucharepressiveregime.我们都忘了自己的政♥府♥有多好WeforgethowgoodWehaveit.我们没忘Yes,wedo.你觉得萧梅会喜欢呆在美国吗？Don'tyouthinkxiao-Meiwouldlikeitbetterhereinamerica?她在这里可以得到自♥由♥和民♥主♥1mean,whereshecouldlearnaboutfreedomanddemocracyandstuff?你说这和让萧梅做家务有关吗？Doesthishaveanythingtodowithyoumakingxiao-Meidohousework?什么？早上我下楼看到她在给地板打蜡What?Icamedownstairsthismorningandfoundherwaxingthefloor.她告诉我你让她缝衣服Shetoldmeyouaskedhertoputontwocoats.首先是她提出来的Well,firstofall,thatwasheridea.其次在你尝过她做的泡芙前我不会和你提这件事Secondofall,Ican'thavethisconversationuntilyou'vetastedhercrabpuffs.Oh.哈Hmm.Mmm.她刚被解救出来Shejustgotdonebeingaslave.她想回中国Imean,shewantstogobacktoChina.我们不能强迫她做我们的女佣Andwecan'tforcehertostayhereandbeourmaid.谁强迫她？Well,who'sforcingher?她要多少薪水我们就付多少We'llpayherwhatevershewants.以她的经历她不会要多少钱Andthebestpartis,withherresume,anywagewilllookgood.不行宝贝Noway,baby.Mnh-mnh.呃Hmm.干嘛？What?干嘛？What?怎么?你得不到想要的东西What,soyoudon'tgetwhatyouwant,就板着脸一走了之？youjustwalkoffandpout?这不是我的关系这关系到我们的国家Oh,thisisn'taboutme.Thisisaboutourgreatnation.我才不会满足你的欲望And1havenointentionofsexuallysatisfyingaman你都不在乎美国的理念和价值观whoisn'twillingtostandupforandhelpspreadtheidealsandvaluesoftheUnitedStatesofamerica.有时她有点刻薄Andsometimessheisalittlehardtostomach,但她是好意的那个butshemeanswell.Well,that's.嗨她来了Hi!Oh,heresheis.接到你留言我就赶来了是他？IcameassoonasIgotyourmessage.Isthis.这是格里.格兰姆你的未来前夫ThisisGarygrantham,yourfutureex-husband.哇见到你很高兴嗨Wow,nicetomeetyou.Hi.好吧我要去见客户Okay,listen,um,vegottomeetaclient.得走了你们相互了解一下I'vegottogo,sojusttalkamongstyourselves,你们很般配andyoutwomakeaveryhandsomecouple.是啊Oh.呃Yeah.嗨嗨Uh,hi.Hi.周三结婚可以吗？SodoyouwannagetmarriedonWednesday?周四和周五我要出差'CauseThursdayandFridaymoutoftown.哦好礼拜三很不错Oh!Oh,yeah.Sure,that's.Wednesday'sgreat.我只是很好奇m.mjustcurious.伊迪怎么能那么快说服你？HowdidEdieconvinceyoutodothissoquickly?她告诉我了你的处境Well,sheexplainedyoursituationtome.我也需要一个假新娘msortofinneedofafakebridemyself,所以我想那很好soIfigured,whattheheck?为什么要个假的新娘？Whywouldyouneedafakebride?我是同性恋我没有告诉过妈妈Uh,mgay,andvenevercomeouttomymother.是吗？Really?是的一开始我只是不想她生气Yeah.Atfirst,Ijustdidn'twanttoupsether.后来她年纪大了得了肺气肿和憩室炎Thenshegotolder,shegotemphysemaanddiverticulitis,我想也许什么都不用说andIstartedthinking,ifIjustkeptmymouthshut,老天会帮我解决这个问题thenonedaynaturewouldtakeitscourse我也能避免告诉她的尴尬场面andwecouldavoidwhatissuretobeaveryuglyscene.后来呢？Sowhatchanged?在上个月她81岁生日聚会上她告诉我Shetoldmeather81stbirthdaypartylastmonth,她之所以能挺这么久是想看到我结婚theonlyreasonshe,shangingonistoseemegetmarried.所以跟我结婚Oh.Oh,sobymarryingme.我能快点拿到遗产Yeah,dgetmyinheritancethatmuchsooner.不当然更多的是让她开心No,butmostly,Iwannamakesureshe'shappy.嗯Mm-hmm.你看上去是好人苏姗Well,youseemverynice,Susan.跟你结婚我很高兴Uh,itwillbeapleasurebeingmarriedtoyou.我也是Uh,likewise.吃点炸鸡Here,youcanfinishtherestofthefries.有你的信和药Here,syourmailandyourpills.呃又是药Ugh.Morepills?特曼小姐？Misstillman?恩？Hmm?信哪里来的？Wheredidthiscomefrom?我不知道和其它邮件放在一起Idon'tknow.Itwasinwithyourothermail.把电♥话♥给我Getmethephone.萨尔曼是我Sullivanjit'sme.我收到新的消息要你介入Ijustgotsomenews,andIneedtogetyouinvolved.看来德尔非诺有事瞒着我1.ookslikeDelfino'sbeenholdingoutonme.第二天早晨布里想到一个计划Thenextmorning,Breecameupwithaplan得到她想要的真♥相♥togettothetruthshesodesperatelyneeded.她看到艾波怀特家离开了屋子Asshewatchedtheapplewhitesleavetheirhouse,她想起了很信任前屋主shethoughtofhowmuchshehadtrustedthepreviousowners而且他们andhowmuchthey.也很信任自己Hadtrustedher.卡博是你吗？Caleb?Isthatyou?嗨Hi.我是布里就住在附近mBree.Ilivedownth